Flojuggler: For The Man Who Knows Nothing Is More Terrible Than A Woman’s Period

Men, are periods wreacking havoc on your lives? Everywhere you turn is there a woman eating a pint of Ben & Jerry’s or unwrapping a Tampax? Does this concern you? You never have to be blindsided again by leaving your man-cave only to confront the terror that is menstruation. A website called Flojuggler allows you to chart the periods of the women in your life and set alerts two days in advance of when your girlfriend, your hook-up or even your mom is on the rag. Presumably you want to do this so you can disregard any irrational things that come out of her mouth while she is possessed by the hormone demons. Although Flojuggler says it could be for men or women, it’s obvious it is being marketed towards dudes who think period sex is kind of icky. It’s not about fertility tracking — although it could possibly be used that way — but for warning you to avoid PMS-y behavior and when Aunt Flo might affect your libido. As the home page says, “Some people just want to know when the bleeding is going to stop so they can get busy!” Personally, I don’t care if a dude doesn’t want to have period sex. But what’s hilarious/sad about Flojuggler is that it assumes you couldn’t just ask a woman you’re sleeping with. Instead, you have to act all creepy about it.

A site like Flojuggler (apparently there is also an iPhone app, but I could not find it) further underscores a problem some people have with women: You need to be warned about us! The home page promises to “avoid embarrassment, frustration and uncomfortable situations.” To most of us, menstruation is something natural which occurs to billions of women around the world every day while we pass laws and perform brain surgery. But for some, it’s a problem: erratic, confusing and something that needs to be watched and tracked so other people can deal with it … even literally.

But, hey, if you’re so opposed to period sex and you’re sleeping with so many women that this is an actual problem, I guess Flojuggler would be handy. [Flojuggler.com]