And now from the “Things Which Sound Like Something On ’30 Rock’ But Are Actually Real” files: The Up Yer Pole pole dancing school in Scotland has begun offering classes for elementary schoolers ages six to 12. Up Yer Pole calls the lessons “pole fit” classes, alleging they are gymnastics classes with no sexual dancing and are open to both girls and boys.
Be that as it may (and I won’t deny a workout on the pole is athletically rigorous), who do these Up Yer Pole people think they’re fooling? Pole dancing has been so inherently sexualized that you can’t just put a child on a pole and say, “It’s OK, it’s all innocent. If you say it’s sexual, then you’re the sick one.” Just ask Miley Cyrus how well that argument works.
Besides, kids aren’t stupid. Even if they go in thinking “pole fit” is just great exercise, eventually they’ll put two and two together and realize having a big metal pole between your legs is inherently very sexual. Kids on the schoolyard talk, you know. At that age, some of them will probably be embarrassed when they realize it is sexual.
If an adult wants to pole dance or become a stripper, that’s fine with me. But let kids — and teens, for that matter — have a childhood. Frankly, it sounds like a money-making opportunity to me and Up Yer Pole is just trying to yank in customers as young as they can.