Contrary to popular belief, guys aren’t satisfied with just getting laid. They want it to be good and exciting too. I know — so demanding. But I aim to please and with that in mind, I convinced a couple of guys I know to confess what they really wish women did more of in the sack.
1. Tell Him What To Do: This was the most common request from the guys I talked to — they’re dying for a little instruction. Guy parts are different from girl parts and sometimes they need to hear what you want. “A lot of the time, mind and body reading is the only way to know what a woman wants,” said one dude. “That’s an art that young men like myself are working on but won’t be able to perfect without some direction or just lots of trial and error.” Likewise, another dudebro said, “Every woman is a little different about what they like, how they like it, and at what frequency and pressure. It’s okay to just shout out ‘Hey! Put your tongue here!’ It helps everybody.”
2. Leave A Little Hair: For now, Brazil has won the pubic battle, but some guys don’t want going bare to win the war. “Too many women are too bald,” said one guy. “There are lots of guys that like the ’70s porn star look. Goddamn, I’ll take a ’70s porn star (who actually looks like a real woman) over a contemporary porn star (who looks like a plastic cyborg Barbie) any day.” Just a sec, I need to replace my waxer’s number in my phone with this guy’s digits. But seriously, while you should groom however you darn well like, consider this further reason to eschew permanent laser hair removal at the very least.
3. Channel Your Inner Truck Driver: While you’re telling him what you want him to do and how to do it, get a little filthy with your vocabulary. “I love it when women use any combination of the words ‘cock, pussy, wet, come, and all over,’” said one potty-mouthed, penis-toting friend of mine. Any combination? How’s this: “COME COCK WET ALL OVER PUSSY”? Oh great, now he’s looking at me funny.
4. Swallow: I would explain this one further, but my mouth is full.
5. Masturbate: I’ll admit it. I kind of like watching a dude jerk off, but sometimes they’re shy about it. Likewise, gals can be bashful about touching themselves in front of their man — don’t be. Dudes like to watch. Rubbing one out for his viewing pleasure also gives him visual instruction to go along with the verbal mentioned in #1.
6. Rub Him Everywhere Else Too: “I would seriously love the occasional back rub or any unsolicited massage,” said a male coworker. Yes, his penis is his number one erogenous zone. But don’t neglect his less boneriffic parts — a back rub shows you care about him, not just getting him off.
7. Be Open-Minded: “Humor us when we want to try something you think is different or weird,” said a guy I used to hook up with. “Don’t immediately say no and dismiss it. We’re boys, we’re curious and chances are we’ll try it once and lose interest anyways.” That’s not to say you should give up anal if you absolutely hate it, but if he’s interested in playing with handcuffs or role-playing, for example, don’t automatically dismiss the idea as him being pervy.
8. Don’t Hold Back: With the exception of being on top, most standard sexual positions put the dude in the driver’s seat, in that they’re doing all the thrusting — but that is not any excuse for just lying there. “If you want to be on top, get on top,” said Paul. “If you want it to be more rough, get rough with us. We don’t mind doing the work, but we don’t want to be the only ones who put in the effort.”
Now that we’ve read through that laundry list of requests, what do you wish men did more of in the sack?