You already know what flies and what doesn’t for summer style, but there are a few other violations that are driving us up the fashion wall. Ill-fitting clothing, poor trend execution, and outdated ideas simply must go. Prevention is key! After the jump, find the faux pas we just can’t handle.
- Colored contact lenses: Blues, greens, hazels, and browns are great eye color enhancers if they work for your skin tone and coloring. Reds, yellows, and other unnatural colors do not match anyone. Stay away, please.
- Clear bra straps: Showing clear straps is tacky. They even reflect sunlight and blind others. Why can’t you just wear a strapless bra?
- Baggy pants, cinched belt: If you’re wearing a belt to keep your oversized pants up, be sure to check your rear before you leave the house. The bunch-up of jean or fabric in the back is like a bunny tail. Who wants their junk in the trunk to look like that? Not us.
- Decked out in designer: If we can name who you’re wearing from head to toe, it’s gotta go. Don’t develop LOB — label-obsessive disorder — it’s hard to treat, and the side effects are bad taste and unoriginality.
- Bridging the age gap … or not: As women, shopping at stores that market to teens and little girls is a big no-no. We know, we know, we miss Limited Too, also.
- VPL: We know visible panty lines are controversial, but the ripple effect on your behind is never attractive. Just. No.
- Fedoras for the sake of the fedora: Don’t get us wrong, we love fedoras, but only if they work for you. If hats usually don’t look good on you, don’t attempt the Jason Mraz effect.
- Crop tops with a side of gut: For the pot-bellied among us, we need to sit this trend out. Don’t worry, there are plenty of other fads to go around.
- Scrunchies: Sorry, Marc Jacobs, but there are plenty of other adorable hair accessories these days. Scrunchies bring us back to our awkward middle school days. We’d rather you wear a baseball cap or a cowboy hat than wear a scrunchie outside of the bathroom.
- Quadri-boob: This is one of the most sinful types of cleavage. Overflowing quadri-boobs, or puddle o’boobs, as Simcha calls them, are a dangerous fashion disaster, and nobody wants to have accidental indecent exposure in public.
