Today, Forbes released their annual list of the World’s 100 Most Powerful Celebrities, which ranks famous folks based on how much they make, how much they’re talked about, and the amount of respect they command. After being ousted from the #1 spot last year by Angelina Jolie, Oprah Winfrey is once again the queen of the list. Right behind her is Beyoncé, followed by James Cameron, who made a huge gain on the list thanks to the success of “Avatar.” Lady Gaga landed on the list in fourth place—which is a pretty spectacular debut, if you ask me.
So, yes, these people are all crazy powerful. But we wanted to boil this down to what really matters—who would win in a fight?
- #1 Oprah versus #2 Beyoncé
Oprah has the height and weight advantage here. But Beyonce has sharper nails and pointier stilettos with which to kick. Not to mention that she can bring out the Sasha Fierce to regulate. And I saw her kick Ali Larter’s butt in “Obsessed.” Beyonce’s got this one in the bag.
- #3 James Cameron versus #4 Lady Gaga
Now, I imagine Lady Gaga can hold her own in a fight. Not to mention that she has a gun bra. But James Cameron is a serious rage-a-holic known for reducing his actresses to tears. I think he could totally psych Gaga out until she yells screaming for her little monsters.
- #5 Tiger Woods versus #6 Britney Spears
Right now, I’m picturing Tiger rushing at Britney, golf club overhead, while she tries to fight him off with an umbrella. Maybe that’s how it would have gone down a year ago. But today, Tiger is trying to clean up his reputation post-scandal. So he’d just turn the other cheek and Britney would walk away with the win.
- #7 U2 versus #8 Sandra Bullock
Sorry, Sandy. Unless we downgrade to a thumb war here, Bono, the Edge and the boys have this one locked up. This is based on numbers. Don’t take it personally.
- #9 Johnny Depp versus #10 Madonna
This is kind of the best match-up ever—the woman with the buffest arms versus the guy with the prettiest face. But my instinct tells me that Madonna won’t fight clean—she’ll pull hair and bite if she needs to—and the Material Girl will triumph.