Tonight on “The Bachelorette,” Ali gets a phone call that changes her life forever. Who is the caller? Jake, calling to beg for her back upon realizing Vienna is a skank who just wants him for his body? Krazy Kasey, saying he got a new tattoo he thinks she’ll like? Paris Hilton, asking to get her ratty extensions back? Or, more likely, some chick saying she’s the girlfriend of one of the bachelors. Whatever, I’m still excited. See ya at 8 p.m. you crazy cats!