6 Amazingly Ridiculous Celebrity Crimes
Dina Lohan was nearly arrested last weekend for trying to steal a Carvel ice cream cake. Apparently, Lindsay’s mom was getting the cake for her son’s 14th birthday and tried to use her daughter Ali’s black “free ice cream for life” card. When the shop employee asked for an ID, they both went ballistic at each other and somehow the situation required police helicopters? When the cops showed up, the guy refused to give Dina her card back and Dina refused to pay for the cake. Dina told reporters, “It just shows how we get treated so much worse than regular people.” To which I offer a loud and hearty guffaw. Is it that hard to just pay for the damn cake? [Celebitchy]
She’s not the only “celeb” caught doing something ridiculous. We’ve rounded up a few comrades for her.
- Ozzy Osbourne has been arrested lots of times for various crimes—including pulling a shotgun on his family’s seven kitties—but the best one was the time he went to the Alamo in 1982 for a magazine photo shoot at 11 a.m. He was intoxicated and wearing one of his wife’s dresses. He proceeded to lift the dress and pee on the Cenotaph in the Alamo plaza. Apparently, he didn’t make it back for another decade because the city refused to let him book shows there after that incident. [My San Antonio]
- I’m still hoping that Edward Furlong has a magical career revival, ’cause I always had a crush on the guy. He also committed my favorite celebrity crime of all time. In 2004, Furlong was arrested for “freeing” a tank of lobsters in a Kentucky grocery store. Apparently, he was drunk and just started grabbing lobsters out of the water and flinging them around the store. By the time police arrived, Furlong was spinning in circles. Too bad Furlong, who’s apparently an animal rights activist, was too drunk to realize the lobsters had nowhere to go. But I kinda like imagining that they scuttled off to the chips aisle for snacks. [The Smoking Gun]
- Turns out Christian Slater is maybe not that bright? In 1989, he brought cops on a car chase, eventually getting caught when he ran into a telephone pole and tried to kick a cop and run away. In 1994, the actor was arrested for trying to bring a handgun onto an airplane. In 1997, he got in a fight with his girlfriend while drunk and high on heroin, and fought the police while screaming, “The Germans are coming and they will kill us!” And in 2005, he grabbed a woman’s butt in the street in the wee hours of the morning and was charged with third-degree sexual assault, but the charges were later dismissed. I would think that Christian Slater could probably just ask for a butt squeeze and most women would oblige? [Absolute Now]
- Lady rapper Foxy Brown was arrested in 2007 after refusing to leave a beauty supply store in Florida. She was allegedly using store products in the bathroom and they asked her to leave, because the shop was closing. Brown screamed, “I have to finish my hair!” When the employee told her, “This is not a beauty salon, it’s a store and you have to leave,” Brown sprayed weave glue and spat at the employee. When the cops arrived, she tried to hit them and was charged with battery. Brown’s also been arrested for attacking manicurists. Beauty rage? [Heckler Spray]
- In 1982, before Woody Harrelson got his big break on “Cheers,” he was arrested for disturbing the peace for dancing in the middle of the street, which has got to be one of the most adorable crimes ever. When the police came to the scene, drunken Woody was thrown in the back of their police van. But Woody made a break for it. Once he was apprehended on foot, he punched one of the cops and was charged with misdemeanor assault and resisting arrest. Future awesome Woody crime sprees include planting hemp seeds in Kentucky and getting charged with “mischief” for climbing the Golden Gate Bridge in protest of the chopping down of California redwood trees. Cutest rap sheet ever. [Absolute Now]