As I predicted, Lee DeWyze snagged the “American Idol” title last night. Go me … I mean … go Lee! But I’ll get back to Lee in a minute since there were two hours’ worth of star-studded performances before we heard his good news.
Contestants teamed up with artists such as Alice Cooper, The Bee Gees, Hall & Oates (woot woot!), Chicago, Joe Cocker, and, most surprisingly, Bret Michaels, who did not appear to be knocking on heaven’s door. He sang “Every Rose Has Its Thorn” with contestant Casey James. In this case, the thorn was James’ off-key singing. Oh yeah, and Christina Aguilera (above) and Janet Jackson popped in to perform as well. No biggie. If only Jay-Z and Beyonce had been there, we might have mistaken this show for the Grammys. If all of that wasn’t enough to make your head explode with musical goodness, there was also a segment with William Hung and the “Pants to the Ground” rapper guy. Amazing!
Finally, since it was Simon Cowell’s last night, there was some major tail-waxing. A parade of Idols from past seasons (with David Cook noticeably missing … hmmm) graced the stage and finally there was that guest appearance by Paula that I promised you. In true form, she rambled a bit, made a joke about her and Simon’s love child waiting backstage, and said something sickeningly sappy about how great Simon is. Awww. She so crazy.
OK, so it was an amazing night on the “Idol” stage. But here’s the part where I get to complain. Initially, I was excited that “Idol” had dropped the annoyingly awful singles that they make the winning contestant release each year. It totally ruins the finale when you have to listen to two great singers eek through a crappy inspirational song like “No Boundaries.” Vom. In lieu of the bad ballad, Lee and Crystal did cover songs that would be released as their coronation single should they win. For Lee, the song was U2′s “Beautiful Day.” Wha? At least Crystal picked a more obscure blues song that she could make popular. Why would Lee pick a song that was already a chart topper just a few years ago? And a really good one at that. He’s a fantastic artist and I’m glad to see him win, but what does he have to add to “Beautiful Day” that Bono and the gang didn’t already nail? Complete mystery to me. Why not “The Boxer” or “Hallelujah”? I’m afraid “Beautiful Day” will result in major confusion, not a major hit. PK, bitch session over. Hopefully, he’ll get his first original record out quickly … and hopefully, it’s good enough to make me forget about “Beautiful Day.” Signing off … until next season, when we’ll finally know who is replacing Simon and if the show can survive without him.