21 Things I Wish I’d Known When I Was 21

MSN recently posted a listicle entitled “31 Things I Wish I’d Known About Dating When I was 21,” which made me think of everything I, too, wish I’d known (about dating and everything else) when I was 21. Instead, I had to learn things the hard way. Save yourself the trouble and just read my list. After the jump, 21 things I wish I’d known when I was 21.

  1. Champagne, vodka, gin and beer don’t mix well.
  2. If he’s not ever calling before 11 p.m., he’s not interested in a real relationship.
  3. “Comfort” and “security” aren’t big enough reasons to stay with someone.
  4. Guys don’t care about — or even notice — those 10 extra pounds.
  5. Love is rarely packaged the way you expect it to be.
  6. It’s generally much kinder to be be direct with someone than pussy-foot around the truth in order to spare feelings.
  7. One of the biggest keys to making friendships last is being flexible in your expectations.
  8. If your happiness with someone is contingent on one little thing he or she needs to change, cut your losses and move on.
  9. If you don’t have the money to pay cash for it, don’t buy it.
  10. Box dye jobs look like box dye jobs (especially if you’re going for red).
  11. If his friends hate you, your days together are probably numbered.
  12. Relationships are not supposed to be hard in the beginning.
  13. If he says he doesn’t want a relationship, he really means it.
  14. Eyebrows really don’t grow back if they’re overly tweezed.
  15. Nude underwear is really the only acceptable color to wear under white pants.
  16. This moment — however good or bad it is — will be just a blip on the radar two years from now.
  17. If he seems obsessed with his ex, he probably is.
  18. Holding a grudge is bad for your back (and soul).
  19. When a vet says your cat has cancer, get a second opinion before you let him operate!!!
  20. A teaspoon is not the same thing as a tablespoon.
  21. Buying it one size too small won’t make you lose weight any faster.