When Lewis Carroll penned the line, “The time has come the walrus said,” I am sure he was referring to the “Twilight” episode of “Oprah.” Right? Well, the special has been plugged for a while and got its biggest push this week when rumors erupted that Kristen Stewart was having Robert Pattinson’s baby. I think most Twi-hards haven’t stopped squealing since—the ones in Oprah’s studio audience certainly hadn’t. The Big O rounded up some of the most manic fans out there, including that one who was holding up a sign that said, “Imprint Me.” After sitting through all the the audience’s screams and a hefty helping of Kristen’s awkwardness, I’ve narrowed it down to the six best moments.
- The Pregnancy Rumor: So let’s acknowledge the bearded baby in the room. Robert Pattinson did say that Kristen Stewart was pregnant, but it was just another way for them to laugh off the questions about their possible relationship. When asked about their status, the two gave a silly response about what sounded like a sea horse pregnancy, where Kristen would pass the baby off to Rob to birth. The reason? Because Kristen is far too delicate to give birth.
- Dakota Knows More Than Kristen: Kristen said herself she, age 20, often calls 16-year-old Dakota Fanning for advice. Oprah praised Dakota for having the reputation of being mature and down-to-earth. And it shows! While Kristen was all bizarro, Dakota knew how to present herself as confident, personable, and full of energy. Plus she answered boring questions with interesting anecdotes. I just wish there were a little osmosis so Kristen could show off who she actually is.
- Robert Pattinson Upped His Dreaminess: I’ve tried to fight it, believe me, but this episode sealed the deal. Rob is just an adorable bumbling fool. He was sent off to meet fans while still suffering from jet lag and couldn’t be more charming. When asked about being named one of Time‘s most influential people, he responded, “Three years ago, I wouldn’t be able to influence my dog to walk.” Come on, it’s cute. As if that weren’t enough, he spent two minutes talking about the difficulty of the American accent. If you hear that boy say “nachos,” your heart will melt.
- Twi-Moms Are Weird: The show stopped in on a group of four moms that form a “Twilight“-loving clan. The foursome has theme parties based on the film, including premiere parties where they pose on a red carpet square with an Edward Cullen cut-out. And when Rob dropped in to surprise fans, it was, as always, the moms who freaked out the most. The mothers rationalize that reading the books is like rediscovering their first love. Works for me.
- Twilight Stars Are Just Like Us. Perhaps, Even Lamer: When the cast was asked about their typical Saturdays, they had pretty boring things to report. Robert says he spends his time manically flipping through his phone book, looking for people to hang out with. Maybe try showering, Rob. Kristen says she has a Bella and Edward-type relationship with her cat and uses her free time to keep that special bond alive and well. Taylor rattled off his TV-watching schedule, which included “American Idol” and “Celebrity Apprentice,” and he bemoaned that fact that there is nothing to watch on Saturdays. This makes my weekend look epic!
- Beef Patties: That is Taylor Lautner‘s secret to his gorgeous body. He explained to get buff for the role of Jacob, he had to eat constantly and what he craved was beef patties. Taylor admitted that he carried around a mini-cooler full of the treat when he knew he wouldn’t be able to get home for a snack. Creepy.