Here Are Some More Words Of Wisdom

A couple weeks back Susannah shared some words of wisdom she’s gained over the “many years” she’s been alive. Well, I’ve been alive a good many years, too, and I am Dear Wendy after all, so I figured I had a few pearls (OK, maybe a few beads) of wisdom to pass along as well. Check ‘em out after the jump.

  1. The best (straight) relationships happen when a man is just a wee bit more enamored with/attracted to the woman.
  2. If you expect your friends to never make mistakes or let you down, you’ll spend your life friendless.
  3. If your relationship is perfect “except for this one little thing,” it’s actually not perfect.
  4. If that “one little thing” is something you can live with, let it go.
  5. No one else notices those five extra pounds.
  6. Money spent on experiences is more valuable than money spent on stuff.
  7. If you haven’t worn it in over a year, get rid of it.
  8. If it doesn’t fit you in the dressing room, it’s not going to fit you any better at home (no matter how much you’re planning to lose weight).
  9. If it’s marked down and fits like it was tailored for you, buy two!
  10. A great bra can shave off ten pounds and ten years.
  11. A free haircut with a beauty school student is rarely worth the price you’ll pay.
  12. Bread before booze.
  13. A good BJ can make up for a host of sins.
  14. If a man calls his ex a “psycho,” that’s a red flag.
  15. If you’re meeting after 10 p.m., it’s not a date.
  16. Bad childhoods are not a life sentence.
  17. If you have a chance to travel, go! See as much of the world as you possibly can.
  18. If it seems too good to be true, it probably is.
  19. The only thing that isn’t survivable is death.
  20. If you think s/he’s cheating, s/he probably is.
  21. Spend at least four seasons with someone before you start talking marriage.
  22. Pack one-third less than you think you’ll wear.
  23. Two gin and tonics are nice, but three is downright evil.
  24. If you spend your life chasing that first high, you’re going to get burnt out really fast.
  25. Before you send a controversial email, save it in your draft folder for at least 24 hours first.