Ask The Astrosexologist: Why Do I Want Him If I Don’t Even Really Like Him?
I am an Aquarius and the man in question is an Aries. He has a lot of good qualities and he’s always encouraged his guy friends to treat their women with love and respect. I like him; however, he has yet to take me on a real date. He wants me to come over, but only when his friends aren’t around. He said it would cause too much drama. All he wants to do is have sex. I did once and it wasn’t all it’s cracked up to be, but his kisses are magic.
Anyway, he asked for another chance to show he wants to be my boyfriend, so I said OK. We were going to go out yesterday, but plans changed — we wound up having sex, and then he got a call from his friends asking if he wanted to hang out and asked if I wanted to go. I wasn’t too thrilled, but said maybe. Then he said we’d have to take separate vehicles to avoid suspicion. It’s like he hit it then hit the road.
I can’t carry on a conversation without him trying to initiate sex. In person I just don’t feel connected. Sex feels disjointed too, but what’s messed up is how intensely I want him! What in the world should I do? – Doomed
Oxytocin is a powerful drug and it sounds like you have been full-on d**kmatized by its essence! After all, there is no other way to explain the wanting of something that isn’t even enjoyable — except for the intimacy of kissing, the sex sucked and you have to face that how a man is in bed with you is also a reflection of your relationship in some way, shape and form. Right now that reflection is showing that he gives what he wants and you just kind of have to take the crumbs. Yes, the answers you need are all right there for you. Trust your instincts; they are there to protect you!
While you might want to turn the other cheek because you are developing fantasies about him (to compensate for the reality not being there), it won’t get you what you want. He gives just enough to keep you interested, even promising a little, then taking it back. This always gives him what he wants, but leaves you with the short end of the stick.
Not wanting to complicate things and taking two cars post-sex is unacceptable, but as long as you allow it, it will go on. There is no turning things back now, but there is a way to put the brakes on where it is going. You’re an Aquarius, a sign that is lured into relationship due to friendship. But this isn’t the best example of how that should be, as the friendship he is offering has too many strings attached. While he might be talking the talk, by telling his friends how to treat women, he is not walking the walk. My suggestion is for you to walk the walk too — as in away and out of sight of this guy.
Got a question for our Astrosexologist, Kiki T? Email [email protected] and be sure to include any astrological information about yourself and any other people involved in your query. For a quicker fix on mastering your man, read Kiki’s astral opus, “The Celestial Sexpot’s Handbook.” Plus, now you can follow Kiki T on Twitter for astrological updates, as they happen!