How Did We Miss The Memo? There’s A Formula For A Happy Marriage

All this time, we were thinking that marriage was a challenging institution requiring love, commitment, effort, and compromise. But according to a new study done at the Geneva School of Business, the likelihood of success in a marriage can actually be predicted with mathematical precision. Researchers claim to have cracked the formula for wedded bliss: The woman should be five years younger than the man, from the same background, and 27 percent more intelligent. I’m assuming that 27 percent is the difference between a bachelor’s and a master’s degree? Other results of the study showed that married couples are happiest 11 months and eight days after tying the knot, feel most comfortable with each other at just under three years, and have their best sex life after two years and four months. Also, the husband helping with household work peaks at three years, weekend getaways drop off after three years and four months, and couples who remain faithful tend to have at least 24 minutes of heart-to-heart convo each day and never go to bed angry.

Well, there it is. That certainly takes all the guesswork out of the whole shebang. Anyone know a 36-year-old Jewish man who will pretend to be stupider than me but genuinely loves to do housework? Anyone? Anyone? [Daily Mail]