Talk About Bad Aim

One of the best things about having mouthy friends who are in long-term relationships is that they tend to spill the beans about super-secret man tendencies that we single chicks miss out on. Like this fun tidbit I learned this weekend from a married friend of mine. She says that when her husband comes home drunk, she has to badger and force him into peeing before going to bed — otherwise, he’s been known to get up in the middle of the night, walk down the hall, and pee in the closet.He’s not the only one who does this. Another friend dated a guy who got so wasted one night that he stood up and peed in their bed while she was sleeping. A guy friend of mine has been known to pee in his dishwasher. And while many other dudes I talked to refused to admit to peeing anywhere but a toilet, they all “knew a guy” who had done this multiple times. Knew a guy, my foot.

Anyway, there is the occasional story of a woman going rogue. A friend of mine once woke up in the middle of the night after an evening of imbibing cocktails, walked out of her apartment, down two flights of stairs, and popped a squat on the fourth floor of her building. She only woke up because her butt was cold from sitting on the concrete. Oopsies!