10 Suggestions For How Jennifer Aniston Can Save Her Career

Has anyone else noticed that Jennifer Aniston’s career has been at a standstill for like … um … since she left “Friends”? Yes, she is good at romantic comedies, but homegirl needs to move on. Whatever happened to growing as an actress and expanding your horizons? Jen seems to be forever stuck in the “Brad’s ex-wife, rom-com queen” niche. Basically, Jen, we’ll die if we have to see you play the same part one more time. Since we care so much, we’ve decided to make some suggestions for Jen to jump-start her career again and save her from celebrity super-boredom. Here’s what we think Jen should do to spice things up …

  1. Like her character in the soon-to-be released film “The Baster,” we think Jen should get knocked up via in vitro. Life imitating art is always interesting.
  2. Since the world is obsessed with Jen’s body, we think she might get everyone’s attention by taking on the part of an obese woman in an Oscar-worthy film. Then everyone can get all excited about how she gained the weight and lost it again. Wow!
  3. Can we recommend a sex tape? Just hopefully NOT with John Mayer.
  4. Do a Shakespeare play, Jen! Or pretty much anything on Broadway. It will earn you acting cred.
  5. Why not adopt a whole mess of Haitian orphans? It worked for Brangelina.
  6. We know what she needs … an edgy show on HBO. Emmy gold. Don’t fight it. Just go back to television, Jen.
  7. She could also broaden her sexual horizons. Maybe Ellen DeGeneres could hook her up with a girlfriend?
  8. When in doubt, change your hair color. Jen’s been blond for too long; how about dark brown instead?
  9. Maybe Jen should play a superhero in an action flick and get all buff. Or a prostitute with a heart of gold. Anything hugely out of genre.
  10. She should start a frenemy feud with Courteney Cox, à la Paris Hilton and Nicole Richie.

Where do you think Jennifer should go from here?