Frisky Reader Revealed: Show Us Your Guns, Mucho Macho

Hands down, the best thing about working at The Frisky is our amazing readers. We so heart all of your witty, thoughtful, and informative comments—heck, we even appreciate the mean ones. Sometimes, we can’t help but wonder about the faces behind avatars. We decided to launch a weekly column where we learn all about a Frisky reader. After the jump, meet Mucho Macho, one of our most prolific commenters.The Frisky: Mucho Macho, please state your full name, age, and location for The Friskyverse.

J: My name is Jake. I’m 27 years old, and live in Milwaukee, WI. I too had an internet problem after divulging my full name on a forum I sort of trusted. Some creepo found me on MySpace, saved a bunch of my pictures, then created a profile with a name just like mine, and made me look like (more of) an a**! My privacy is golden now, which is why I am not stating my last name. I haven’t had a MySpace or Facebook account since, and my life is, shockingly, still quite full!

F: How did you find the site?

J: When I was on the prowl (“creeping” for my Guidos and Guidettes). I used to read Cosmo all the time to gain a better insight on the female brain (Sun Tzu: “Know thine enemy … “), so when CNN started posting Frisky articles and I saw how much more sense they made than “101 Ways to Satisfy your Man” (there are really only four: be quiet, give me orgasms, make me a sandwich, and … more orgasms), I was hooked.

F: What do you do all day, other than follow The Frisky, which is totally condoned?

J: I actually JUST started [going] back to school, after a four year break! I have been working full time at a bank, doing payroll (a job which provides one AMPLE time to play on the internet), but have cut my hours in half, and am typing this after a full day of classes (18 credits, woof). This is going to sound macho and lame, but I hit the gym up every morning, train Brazilian Jiu Jitsu and MMA three to five times per week, and play semi-pro football. Semi-pro = for fun, not money. I actually got invited back to a camp for an arena team (arena = pro = $) after a tryout two weeks ago, and am pretty amped for that.

F: Relationship status?

J: In a committed relationship for the last four years or so. Anne and I have lived together for about a year and a half now. She is a nurse (hawt) and when I get my teaching degree, we plan to move somewhere nice and warm. We’ll be taking her cat (Pepper Nellie) and my pitbull (Foxy Lady) with us. In case you couldn’t tell, that’s her in the picture. I figured it was okay to flash some skin for the ladies (and anyone else interested) as long as I was properly portraying my status in life.

F: What is your fave post in recent Frisky history?

J: Meeting -jsw-! I hope the comments on my intro are half as deviant as the ones on his.

F: What are your pop culture guilty pleasures?

J: “Jersey Shore,” “GTL”, TUF, Justin Timberlake, and singing Lady Gaga (loudly) in my car.

F: Can you share your most embarrassing dating story? We always share ours. It’s only fair.

J: This is easy. For Valentine’s Day last year I wanted to plan something awesome. My GF is all about meaningful gestures, and one of her friends’ BF had done some great thing I can’t remember that they were all gushing about, so I knew I had to do it right. We both love the Disney movie “The Lion King” and had watched it for one of our first dates at my house. The Broadway musical was coming to town, and tickets were supposed to be IMPOSSIBLE to get. Since I had so much free time at work I refreshed the Ticketmaster screen for like three hours straight one day, and finally got two seats to one of the shows! I was ecstatic. The super-thoughtful BF had already told his chick he couldn’t get tickets, so I was about to look like Superman. I played the big date up to Anne for like two weeks. I told her what a great night I had planned for us, how we would need to dress up, etc. The day of the show arrived and I went all out. I invited her over and cooked up some really pricey steaks, served a nice bottle of wine, and wore a suit (rare). I had even just washed and waxed the Lexus (before you assume I’m a baller, it’s from 1995). I was feeling very, very smooth. We had our romantic, candlelit dinner. We loaded into the car, drove downtown, and started walking to the theater when I decided it might be a good time to double check my tickets. I froze in mid-step. She said, “What is it?” And I started laughing. Our tickets were for the show the following week. I was clown of the month with all of her friends. I still hear about it when we all get together. But the show was really good … a week later.

F: Who is your celebrity doppelganger?

J: Bruce Willis in “Tears of the Sun.” He looks like he’s my identical twin (+20 yrs).

F: What type of skivvies do you have on right now?

J: Light blue boxer-briefs with dark blue trim. Hanes, I think.

F: Can you share the last text message you sent?

J: “Haha … Okay. I admit to it.”

F: What is your secret talent?

J: I sing Madonna songs pretty well. Notably “Like a Prayer.”

F: Favorite book, movie, musician or band?

J: Book: Ender’s Game by Orson Scott Card. Movie: Possibly “Avatar” (in 3-D) but I need to check it’s rewatchability, so I’ll go with “Gladiator.” Musician: Tom Petty.

F: Who is your celebrity obsession?

J: I used to have Claire Forlani as my wallpaper. She was my big celeb crush while I was in college.

F: What’s something you hope to see more of on The Frisky?

J: Political debate, oddly enough. We have our tense moments, but this is a fun community to practice arguing with.