An Open Letter To The Fellas: Women are not turned on by how fast you can finish Zelda or the fact that the plastic guitar you use to play Beatles Rock Band is customized. And when you ask us to blow into your Nintendo game cartridge, we know exactly what you’re thinking. I’ve dated a slew of video game nerds: guys who work at G4, guys who design video games for a living, guys who test video games for a living, guys who have video game tattoos, guys who are broke because they spent their money on an XBox, guys who’ve traded their XBox to get more video game tattoos. All of this gets old. So it’s not surprising that a British survey shows that one in five women have broken up with a guy because he wouldn’t put down the controller. Plus 80 percent of the women surveyed believe that their current partner wastes too much time gaming.Hilariously, the game that seemed to cause the most problems was “Call of Duty,” a first-person shooter game. Which reminds me, boys—just because you stole a car in Grand Theft Auto, or killed a bunch of orcs in World of Warcraft, does not mean that you are tough. It’s really just a step up from live-action role playing … but less interesting because you haven’t actually moved in three days and you’re not wearing a sexy elf costume. I know it might be shocking, but when we’re hanging out, we want to celebrate actual life—not enter into a virtual reality world. A certain amount of gaming is acceptable. I immensely enjoy Rock Band, and the long-defunct McDonald’s game MC Kids. Friendly competition is fun, but we can only handle so much gamer thumb and shop talk.
So, ladies, have you ever ditched a guy who paid more attention to his Wii than the general “We”? And gentlemen, what the hell is wrong with you guys? [Asylum]