Heidi Montag: A Delusional Topless Burglar?

Heidi Montag is like a media amoeba. She’s in the news for one thing—her album coming out—and all of sudden she’s on the cover of People talking about her plastic surgery addiction. Next thing you know, homegirl is everywhere. Here’s the latest Heidi news percolating on the interwebs, from how she thinks her new album will be as timeless as Michael Jackson’s best-selling record to the topless photos of her that went missing.

  • Continuing the theme of insanity that has run throughout her and Spencer’s relationship, Heidi says that her album holds up to “Thriller.” She also spent a ton of money putting this thing out. “I’ve spent over a million, almost $2 million on this album. It’s cost as much or more than a Britney Spears album, because I wanted it to be that quality,” she said. “I think within the first week we will definitely make our money back. The songs will make an impact in pop history.” [EW]
  • Back in November, when Heidi had 10 plastic surgery procedures at one time, she was being transported by ambulance to a recovery center. On the way, a phone which had photos of Heidi’s rack throughout the procedure (um, so gross) went missing. Heidi’s assistant (uh, why does she have an assistant?) freaked and asked the ambulance to turn around. Phew. The phone was found inside. [TMZ]
  • Yesterday, when Heidi returned home, a neighbor called the police and reported a burglary. “We’re grateful this was only a false alarm and I just had my pink Hermes scarf over me,” Heidi said. “A neighbor was concerned and called the police. We’re thankful to the LAPD for their response and making sure we were safe.” Maybe it was the scarf that threw the neighbor off. Or her entirely new face? [People]