OK, so forgive me for missing this crazy-ass “Good Morning America” report last week, but after coming across it today, I could stand silent no more and simply had to share: Turns out, new clothes are so freakin’ filthy and disgusting that even I am grossed out by them, and that’s saying a lot. Not sure about you folks, but, personally, I never wash new clothes before wearing them. Maybe I would — and something always told me I probably should — but I live in NYC so I don’t have a washer and dryer and it’s an expensive time suck to do laundry. (That said, I do get around to it. Eventually.) Anyway, sneaky “GMA” investigators bought a bunch of new shirts and crap, and then had a microbiologist test the fabric for contamination.
Ladies and gentlemen, the results will shock you.
“The customer probably gets the wool pulled over their eyes,” said Tori Patrick, a former retail saleswoman interviewed for the piece. Har har! But seriously, Ms. Patrick is correct on one count: Most of us just kind of assume that a newly purchased item is unworn and fairly clean enough to rip the tags off and wear out. Apparently, not so much. Not only do returns go straight back on the racks (and some a-holes really do wear the stuff out on the town then return it the next day), but people also try on the clothes in the dressing room, and the thing about people is that they are gross.
Of the 14 new items tested for germs, their impartial NYU microbiologist found an alarming number of respiratory secretions and skin and fecal flora (germs) on shirts and jackets. I ask you, how does poop get on a shirt? Actually, don’t wanna know. A silk blouse had vaginal flora on it (!?), and all were grossly contaminated with multiple organisms, leading the researcher to speculate that either many people tried them on or one really, really dirty and/or sick bastard did. He basically likened trying on a new article of clothing to touching a stranger’s armpit or groin. And even if you’re all “whatevs” about that, he also maintained that it would be entirely possible to transmit, say, a stomach flu virus via fabric.
Dude. Not only does this make me determined to alter my non-washing new shiz stance, it makes me feel weird about trying things on, period. Maybe wearing an undershirt out shopping would help? Ugh, major shopping boner killer. [ABC News]