David Archuleta’s Dad Likes Hookers, And Other Fun Info We’ve Learned From Divorce Papers!

No matter how old you are, it must suck to find out your parents are getting divorced. And it must suck even more for Radar Online to get a hold of your parents’ divorce papers, and reveal that part of the reason for said divorce is because your dad was arrested in a massage parlor in Utah, allegedly soliciting a prostitute. This is exactly what has just happened to “American Idol” season seven contestant David Archuleta. We feel terrible for him that this is now public knowledge. [Popeater]

It seems like we always get a little too much information when divorce papers get leaked. Here are a few of the dooziest.

  • In Michael and Dina Lohan’s divorce papers, it appears that Michael threatened to kill his wife and kids, telling the family’s security guard, “O.J. Simpson has nothing on me, I know exactly how I’m going to kill (them). I know when I’m going to do it, and I’m going to enjoy it.” Lohan also allegedly beat Dina on several occasions. That guy’s such a scumbag. [Fox News]
  • In other Lohan-related divorces, Lindsay came up in the divorce papers of British heiress Stephanie Allen, who was married to Tony of the band Dead Stays Alive. Tabloids claimed that Lindsay had sex with Tony in the bathroom of their mutual rehab clinic, the Cirque Lodge in Utah. Apparently “Exhibit A,” which was attached to the divorce papers, included the In Touch article describing their alleged affair. Doesn’t she know that tabloids aren’t real? [The Insider]
  • We all remember when Miss California, Carrie Prejean, told us that she didn’t believe in “opposite marriage.” But it was twice as shocking when her parent’s divorce papers emerged and showed that both sides accused the other of homosexuality. Carrie and her sister allegedly witnessed her father’s roommate in bed with another man, and we learned the intriguing theory that all gay men have mustaches. Naturally. [Guanabee]
  • Newsprint executive Peter Brant and supermodel Stephanie Seymour had a messy divorce where Brant accused Seymour of spending $257,000 a month ($50K of it on clothes), stealing/destroying art from their mansion, and abusing prescription drugs like Vicodin. Isn’t that the part of marrying out of your league— dealing with them acting like a jerk all the time? [Popeater]
  • The Jon and Kate Gosselin’s divorce papers were surprisingly tame, but the couple did claim that they have “lived separate and apart for at least two years.” Which was surprising to all of us who’ve been watching them together on the show without noticing how much the apparent tension was actually very real. Sad face.[Access Hollywood]
  • Charlie Sheen and Denise Richards really went at each other during their divorce, but in the divorce papers, Richards obviously had the upper hand. She accused Sheen of assaulting her and threatening her life. She said he had an addiction to gambling and hookers, and visited porn sites featuring underage boys and girls, not to mention that he used foul language in front of their kids. She also says he solicits women on sex websites, sending them pictures of his penis, and he convinced her to abort their first child. Wow. That’s all I can say about that. [The Smoking Gun]