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Enter This Penis Haiku Contest!

I have been writing bad poetry for as long as I can remember. Well, at least since I penned the gripping haiku, “The Spark,” in 7th grade. I can’t share it … it’s just too embarrassing. But yes, it does follow the 5-7-5 syllable pattern. Can I still write a hard-hitting haiku? Yes, I believe I can. And now I have the chance I’ve been waiting for. Alan Wieder, author of the new memoir Year of the C**k, which chronicles his penile trials and tribulations, is having a contest to find the best haikus about his favorite topic … the penis. You bet your c**k I am entering my phaiku (penis + haiku) on his website for a chance to win an autographed copy of the book. Check out my masterpiece after the jump. [Asylum]Here is Alan’s example phaiku:

It wakes hard as birch
A schooner’s mast soaring high
Time to spank one out

And my amazing addition:

He will travel to
Deep space of my vagina
A small step for man

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