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Robbers Steal $400K Worth Of Underwear And Pantyhose

Last week in an intricately planned heist, thieves stole about $400,000 worth of underwear, tights, garters, stockings, and shoes from a truck making deliveries to the chain store Next. How? They cut open the sides of the parked vehicle. The Leicestershire Police have no leads, and only know that the robbery occurred between 9 p.m. and 4 a.m. Given the sheer quantity of items stolen, they believe that there was probably more than one thief and that a vehicle was used to move the goods. In an effort to gather information, cops have asked people to “keep a lookout for anyone selling the items described” or to contact them “if you know someone who has acquired items similar to those we described … and you are suspicious of how they obtained them.” Basically, the po po has absolutely no idea who stole this stuff and are totally screwed unless someone walks by sporting it all at once. What we want to know is, why are these people wasting their time robbing pantyhose trucks? With those cop-confounding skills, they could be robbing banks. Perhaps they’re gathering pantyhose disguises for the largest bank robbery ever? [Metro]

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