Spoiler Alert! “Sex And The City 2″ Plotlines Revealed!

Major spoiler alert! Details are being uncovered left and right about “Sex and the City 2” and we’re going to totally ruin it for you. The movie comes out in May of 2010, and it’s been filming in New York and Morocco all summer. (Morocco? Why? Guess you’ll have to read more to find out.) Journalists are using every method available to gather information, and we’ve pieced the gems together for your spoiling pleasure. Just pretend this blog is the source material and, essentially, you’re just reading the book before the movie, for once.

  • Carrie Bradshaw (Sarah Jessica Parker) and Big (Chris Noth) are happy newlyweds for a while. But at some point, Big loses a lot of money in the recession and CareBig (as I like to call them) are forced to move in with Charlotte and Harry. Big heads to the Middle East (hence, Morocco) to try to make enough money to support Carrie and her shoe habit.
  • Us Weekly found a casting notice which read, “Big takes a job in London, living alone in a one-bedroom apartment. Big gets really low and ends up in bed with another woman. After she leaves him, Carrie discovers she is pregnant.” Oh geez, can you imagine Carrie as a single mother? And why can’t Big stop f**king everything up?! [Us Weekly via Celebuzz]
  • As you may have figured from the ugh-tastic ’80s stylings that were revealed this week, there will be a flashback to when the girls first met! A little awkward now that they’re all older, but can’t wait to see how they wrote that scene!
  • A British paper zoomed in on Kim Cattrall’s script and figured out that Smith Jerrod (i.e., Jason Lewis, the Absolute Hunk) is back in the picture. But Samantha Jones will also lust after British actor Max Ryan, who plays a sexy architect. Samantha will allegedly be poppin’ hormone pills since she’s well into her 50s now, but she’s still got an enviable body for any age. [NY Daily News]
  • Charlotte York-Goldenblatt (Kristin Davis) apparently struggles with raising her children and accuses her adorable, not-so-hairy husband Harry (Evan Handler) of cheating on her. She runs off with her daughters Lily and Rose, but it turns out that Harry was just meeting with a contractor because he was building her dream house. So they get back together and live happily ever after. Boooring.
  • Miranda Hobbs (Cynthia Nixon) leaves her workaholic lawyer life behind when she gets sued for malpractice and instead she bonds with little Brady and opens up a restaurant with Steve. How old is Brady now — 16? Since when are Miranda and Steve foodies? The only food moments I recall with them are getting pizza and that time that Miranda ate the chocolate cookie out of the garbage … which I guess could make for an interesting restaurant concept?
  • It’s also rumored that Stanford Blatch (Willie Garson) will marry wedding planner Anthony Marentino (Mario Cantone). Just imagine what a gay wedding planner could do with his own wedding! Plus, Liza Minnelli is going to sing at their wedding reception! Eep! [Brisbane Times]