31 Great Vaginal Moments: What Naomi Wolf Shouldn’t Overlook In Her History Of The Vagina

Naomi Wolf is penning her own vagina monologue: The New York Observer reports that the author of the Women’s Studies 101 staple The Beauty Myth is now writing a book tentatively titled A Cultural History Of The Vagina. But what could Wolf possibly say about our lady parts that wasn’t said before in Eve Ensler’s play, The Vagina Monologues, Inga Muscio’s book, C**t, or Jessica Valenti’s book The Purity Myth?

Quite a bit, actually! After the jump, great moments in coochie history that Wolf mustn’t forget to include in her vagina book! —[NY Observer]

  1. Paparazzi snap pics of Britney Spears’ period blood-stained undies and the pervy celeb-upskirt-photo trend is born
  2. The ever-quotable Megan Fox tells Cosmopolitan that vaginas give women power over men
  3. Kate Winslet dons a “merkin” (a pubic hair wig) for The Reader
  4. Lady Gaga supposedly told peeps she’s a hermaphrodite, then said her vadge was “offended” when people made a big deal about it
  5. Women’s rights activists focus their attention on the scourge of female genital mutilation/female circumcision in developing countries
  6. Everything about “Sex & The City,” but especially the episode where Magda finds Miranda’s vibe, and the one where Carrie and Charlotte get Brazilians
  7. Lindsay Lohan hobbled into the hillbilly ER with a broken cooter in a Saturday Night Live skit
  8. Red Bull Energy Douche gave Mandy Moore’s vagina wings
  9. Madonna posed for Louis Vuitton ads with her legs spread
  10. Jane Fonda said “c**t”on the “Today” show
  11. Some teenaged girls get “purity rings” from their fathers and pledge to remain virgins until they are married (although, in fairness, boys do it too)
  12. Gawker alerted everybody to what they said was Jennifer Aniston’s “lady flower,” but it turned out just to just be her upper thigh
  13. “Teeth,” while cringe-worthy for dudes, is the funniest movie about a woman with vagina dentata ever
  14. Coochie-centric commercials, like the topiary-themed one for the Schick Quattro Trimstyle Razor and Bikini Trimmer, become all the rage
  15. The vulva puppet debuts on “The Tyra Show”
  16. “The Thong Song”
  17. Peggy Olsen gets a little vibe action on Mad Men
  18. … a few decades later you can’t throw a rock without a hitting a woman with her own pleasure toy
  19. The venerable New York Times actually wrote an article about how people use the word “va-jay-jay”
  20. The entire Georgia O’Keefe oeuvre of paintings that look like vaginas
  21. The terrifying increase in popularity of vaginoplasty (plastic surgery on your lady bits!), chronicled on such programs as “Dr. 90210“
  22. Abercrombie & Fitch sells thongs for tween girls with phrases like “eye candy” and “wink wink” on them
  23. The Gardasil vaccine, which helps prevent some strains of cervical cancer
  24. Some weirdo company made a perfume called Vulva, which supposedly smells like vadge
  25. “G-shot” injections supposedly help stimulate a woman’s G-spot during sex
  26. New Jersey threatened to outlaw Brazilian bikini waxing over safety concerns
  27. The strange trend (er, “trend”) of color dyeing one’s pubes
  28. Thanks to the leggings trend, the phrase “camel toe” was born and camel toe products blew up
  29. The invention of the diaphragm, the IUD, and the female condom
  30. A Russian woman allegedly undergoes six hymenoplasties to “restore her virginity” for her husband
  31. And let’s not forget, Barbie dolls, American Girl dolls, and other children’s toys who mysteriously have no genitals whatsoever

Whew! That’ll keep Ms. Wolf up to her labia in work to do. But we’re sure there are others. Any other great moments in vagina history you think we missed?