10 Rules About The Way Men And Women Eat

Esquire.com recently posted a “personal catalog” of 30 “likes, dislikes, habits, and rules” about the way men eat. I haven’t thought much about it before, but looking at this list, I suddenly realize that men and women are practically opposites when it comes to mealtime. After the jump, 10 habits and rules for men from Esquire, plus our own personal catalog of 10 likes, dislikes, habits, and rules about the way women eat. Esquire’s Personal Catalog of Men’s Eating Habits

  1. A plate of salami can be a meal, if it’s what’s there. You look around. Fried eggs over tortilla chips. Hunger spurs creativity in a man.
  2. I’ll dip just about anything in just about anything — something from the fridge, something at the other end of the table. Fried chicken in the guacamole. A slice of pizza in the tub of take-out ranch. Whatever’s in front of me.
  3. If I love the waitress, I tell her to bring me whatever’s good. This has afforded me many discoveries.
  4. I would rather wait till dinner than have brunch.
  5. A man doesn’t need more bread. More chips maybe, but not more bread.
  6. You can cook a good meal in the time it takes to drink one cocktail.
  7. A beer with lunch can be transformative.
  8. I don’t particularly enjoy sharing. Except with a woman, and then only on the first two dates or any wedding anniversary after the tenth.
  9. There are few greater joys than eating a Cinnabon and drinking coffee while parked, alone, at the Walt Whitman Service Area on the New Jersey Turnpike on a cold morning.
  10. Eating while walking, no. While driving, yes.

The Frisky’s Personal Catalog Of Women’s Eating Habits

  1. A box of Wheat Thins, a few baby carrots and some cream cheese can be a meal if that’s what’s there.
  2. Women will dip just about anything into cheese (see above) — a hunk of bread, some grape tomatoes, a piece of pizza, or a slice of apple.
  3. If we love the bartender, we tell him to make us his specialty. This has afforded us a few good drinks … and many hot dates.
  4. I would rather skip every other meal of the day to have brunch.
  5. There is no such thing as too much bread.
  6. Sometimes a cocktail is a meal.
  7. A beer with lunch can be transformative (ah, something we agree on!).
  8. We’ll share our salad if you share your fries!
  9. There are few greater joys in life than sipping a latte on a Sunday morning while eating a lightly toasted whole wheat bagel with veggie cream cheese and reading the New York Times Style section.
  10. Eating while walking, no. Eating while having sex, maybe.