A website called DJMICK has posted an A-Z guide to female names in which they call Amelia “a bit old-fashioned,” Anneka (their spelling) “sporty in and out of the bedroom,” Catherine as one who “needs ironing,” and Wendy as a woman who “works on a building site, possibly a man.” What?! Well, we can play that game, too! After the jump, my A-Z guide to male names.Adam — Drives a big car to make up for his little penis.
Brad — Swings both ways.
Charles — Sweet, but cannot turn off The History Channel.
David — Cries like a girl.
Ethan — Bad kisser.
Frank — Has a bit of a gambling problem.
George — Not the brightest bulb in the pack.
Hank — Strong, stable, dependable.
Ian — Makes a great gay boyfriend.
Jake — Lovable loser.
Kevin — Doesn’t know how to tie a bow tie.
Lester — Can’t stand the taste of eggs.
Mike — Thinks every day’s gonna be his last.
Nathan — Used to be a girl.
Oliver — Can’t say his “s’s”
Patrick — Secretly worships Prince.
Quincy — Bad speller.
Rob — Is good with dogs.
Steven — Potent sperm.
Taylor — 40-year-old virgin.
Usher — Like anchovies on his pizza.
Victor — Gallant: will hold umbrellas over women’s heads on a rainy day
William — Excellent tennis player. Not good at much else.
Xavier — Works hard, plays hard.
Yates — Grew up in Jersey, but has a fake British accent.
Zach — Good kisser.
