Caridee English Is America’s Next Top Slob

If you’re an avid “ANTM” fan like me, then of course you remember the seemingly sweet and likable Cycle 7 winner, Caridee English. I was sympathetic toward her after she revealed her childhood struggle with eczema, and I totally rejoiced when she beat that annoying, know-it-all Melrose. (I can almost hear her awful voice ringing in my ears, “I was so skinny as a child that I had to learn to make my own clothes!”) That’s why I was floored when I found out that Caridee might be America’s Next Top SLOB. An anonymous New Yorker recently outed her, claiming that she sublet her apartment to English and her boyfriend via Craigslist. When she moved back in after a couple of weeks, this unsuspecting victim found her apartment looking like a cross between a sorority house and a mental institution. Now that’s a reality show I’d like to see: “Reality TV Sublets Gone Wrong.” After the jump, the disgusting details of Caridee’s alleged trail of destruction. [Gawker]

  • Wake and Bake. Everyone knows that real tanning is bad for you, which is why Caridee and her dude Ryan are apparently big on fake tanning. The apartment owner found a scary layer of an orangey tan dust on the sheets, towels, and bath mats. No doubt the couple is basking in their orange glory.
  • Cutting it Up. Apparently, the couple is big on “cutting” themselves. Among other delightful findings were little black hairs all over the bathroom and Band-Aids stuck to the floor. Interesting.
  • Rotten Fruit. Of course models don’t really eat, but they do need to keep food for show. But when your “show food” goes rotten, it is important to throw it out lest you get a colony of fruit flies living in the kitchen.
  • Smearing Party. Subletting your apartment is anxiety-provoking enough without having subletters who smear. Supposedly, Caridee and Ryan like to smear stuff on the walls instead of using traditional methods like towels or toilet paper. Imagine returning to your place to find mysterious black sludge and lipstick on the walls. Oh, and diarrhea medicine on the bathroom floor. Wait—is that related to the “mysterious black sludge?” I don’t know if I can handle the answer.

So what does Caridee have to say for herself? She calls these accusations “extremely false.” It’s very possible that she’s the victim of a prank here, but take it as a warning: exercise extreme caution when taking in a reality celebrity subletter.