Quickies!: Is This The Next Chris Brown?

  • Aubrey “Drake” Graham, Rihanna’s rumored boyfriend, has scored a record deal with Young Money and Universal Republic. And like Rihanna, he has collaborated with Kanye West and Jay-Z. [Perez Hilton] — At least he doesn’t have that deranged baby face look like Chris.
  • Neverland will host a huge memorial service for legions of Michael Jackson fans. [PopEater] — Hmm, I guess this means Chris Brown can also win back his fans, regardless of his legal troubles.
  • Some woman was being questioned by police about a murder, and what do you know, a squirrel popped out of her cleavage. And she promptly pushed it back in. [Dlisted] — I’m sure that’s animal abuse somewhere.

  • Check out these four-eyed female celebrities, and get in touch with your inner librarian. [TrèsSugar] — Chloe Sevigny makes one sexy geek.
  • Five men tackle the age-old question of whether chivalry is dead. [Your Tango] — Chivalry is only alive when the man is screwing you or wants to screw you.
  • Why do people have one night stands? [Shine] — Because they’re horny. Or am over-simplifying things?