I love a hero. It’s hard to resist those devastatingly handsome leading men who duel evil at great personal cost. And yet, I have more of a thing for the sidekick. Sure their characters are underdeveloped and their emotional growth is equal to that of a chia pet, but sidekicks are severely underrated. Just because the sidekick wasn’t born with an ultra cool destiny or figure out how to get bitten by a radioactive spider doesn’t mean he doesn’t deserve love. Besides for the tiny fact that sidekicks have an annoying tendency to die, here is why the sidekick is undoubtedly better boyfriend material.
- Leading men are always sacrificing something, and chances are they are going to sacrifice you. They can never be happy because they have serious business to take care of. With the leading man you will always be his second priority (the first is always saving the world in some way or another) and chances are he will sacrifice you. Ginny Weasley, you should have slapped Harry Potter when he dumped you. Sure, he had something super duper important to do and he really really really loved you, but he wouldn’t tell you.
- Leading men always have issues and complexes. Maybe they wouldn’t be the center of attention if they didn’t have issues, but either way, do you want to deal with the hero complexes, daddy complexes, destiny complexes, etc.? Can you even begin to contemplate Luke Skywalker’s therapy bills? The sidekicks are a more simple folk. Sidekicks come from loving homes or they don’t have homes. Did you ever notice that the sidekick’s family makes the Brady Bunch look dysfunctional or the sidekick’s past is never mentioned? The sidekick will bring you into his perfect cozy family, or the writer never created the sidekick’s family so you don’t have to deal with them or the issues they created at all.
- Leading men are so self-centered. Maybe because of the above mentioned issues leading men can’t help but be thrust into the spotlight, but methinks there is a touch of the attention-whore in most of heroes. Do you think Batman would ever ask you how your day at the office was? Nope, he is just going to want to brag about how he saved Gotham City, again, and then mope in a corner about how know one understands his pain. Oh puhleeze. Sidekicks are by nature aware of those around him. He shares and he cares. The sidekick will be there with you as you battle everything from the demons in your life to the cockroach in the kitchen.
- Ever seen a leading man crack a smile? Occasionally perhaps, but chances are your leading man pouts more than a model during Fashion Week. Hey, I love an intense stare as much as the next gal, but I realize that the soul penetrating glare is just a bit too intense for an entire dinner date. Sidekicks are known for irresistible smiles, charming manners and sweet dispositions. He is never socially awkward so it’s not as if you have to worry about him laughing at a funeral or anything. The sidekick can be serious when he needs to be, but you will have loads of laughs and tons o’ fun while the leading man skulks.
- At the end of the day, the sidekick’s best quality is not just something we don’t like about the leading man. What makes a sidekick a sidekick is his loyalty and selflessness. A true sidekick sticks by his best bud through thick and thin, and it’s usually pretty thin. If the dude’s character is pure and kind enough to win him the number two spot, chances are he deserves to be your number one man.