Normally, when reality TV stars talk about how in love they are, I involuntarily roll my eyes. (See: Paris Hilton talking about how she wants to marry boyfriend Doug Reinhardt, only to dump him, like, a week later.) But when I read that Bethenny Frankel from “The Real Housewives of New York City” has a new guy, I felt kind of giddy. “I’m in love,” she told People over the weekend. “I was getting my picture taken [at a restaurant in New York City] and I had a scowl on my face. He came up and said, ‘Are you going to get that stick out of your a–?’ I’m pretty much certain I’m going to spend the rest of my life with him…I’m really happy.” Her dude’s name is Jason Hoppy and they’ve been together for eight months. He’s a pharmaceutical rep who also does real estate. And look at his dreamy blue eyes! [People]So why am I so excited for Bethenny? Because last season, she became my single girl idol. I watched her talk through feelings about her breakup with that bald dude just as I was breaking up with someone. I watched her question whether there were any decent guys left in New York City when I was wondering the same thing. I remember getting home from a great date one night and flipping on the TV to see Bethenny at a restaurant flirting with a hot South American dude. I’m a few years younger, but I’m in the same place as Bethenny. I’m healed from past relationships, very happy with my life, and ready for love. The question mark is when that will come along.
On paper, men should be tripping over themselves to date Bethenny. She’s successfully started her own healthy-cooking empire. She’s hilarious, sharp, and loyal. Oh, and gorgeous. But I sometimes worry that she, like myself, is an acquired taste. That only a certain type of guy can handle her. While I’d like to think that being successful is a big check mark for dudes, I’m just not sure that it always is, especially for the ones feeling at all insecure about their own career trajectory. And Bethenny isn’t the type of girl who will just show up and look cute at a party—she challenges people and calls them on their BS. She knows what she wants, and isn’t about to settle. In the end, she’s a woman who wants a great guy in her life, but doesn’t need one. But I sometimes worry that too many guys prefer the later.
Not only was it hard seeing Bethenny get beat up by the dating circuit, but watching how the other Housewives related to her was eye-opening. I remember one scene where Countess LuAnn de Lesepps decided to give Bethenny first date advice, like speak softly so he has to lean in. Ummm, gross? She’s single—not desperate. Or clueless. Oh, and then there was Ramona barking about how Bethenny is the “underdog” because she doesn’t have a guy? Please. After watching some of these episodes, I started to notice that a do have a few married/in-serious relationship friends (note: a few, most are amazing) who seem to make the ever-so-subtle assumption in our interactions that they have won and I have lost. And I just don’t think that’s true—we’re all eternally playing the game, you know?
I am now rambling. I guess it comes down to…if Bethenny’s found her dude, perhaps there’s hope for me.