What Makes A Man Date-able?
Marie Claire’s sensitive man, Rich Santos, feels like he’s undateable. In fact, he’s even made a list of reasons women won’t touch him. He blames his solitude on the habits of longtime bachelordom, his need to be the center of attention, his motormouth, and his not-so-smooth dance moves. (Of the latter, he wrote: “Uncorking the River Dance, or a late ’80s rap move, doesn’t get me anywhere. Also, I employ semi-gay ‘summoning power from the Heavens’ Celine-Dion-like hand gestures.”)
Hey Rich, we’ve got one more to add to your list of red flags — dating a relationship blogger. Sigh, just look at what a mess of our own love lives we Frisky gals have made! But since we are Rich’s female counterparts, we decided to answer his question for the ladies: “What makes a guy more ‘dateable’ to you?” Oh, we’ll tell you what women want, right after the jump.
- Take Care Of Yourself: No one wants to get close to someone who looks like a health hazard. You don’t have to get all manscaped, just clean up nice on the regular. Same goes for your apartment, if you plan on ever taking me home with you.
- Your Mama Isn’t Your Best Friend Or Your Worst Enemy: If you make it seem like no girl can ever live up to the amount of love your mommy has given you, no girl will even want to try. Same goes for the opposite; if you think your moms is the devil, then you’re the spawn of Satan.
- You Can Laugh At Yourself: Even if you’re a klutz, things only get weird when you freak out or get really agro. If you accept how entertaining your mistakes are, then we’ll think you’re spaz-tastic! And then we can laugh with you, as opposed to behind your back with our girlfriends.
- You Have More To Talk About Than Work: Read a book, race cars, follow a TV show, knit for all I care, just have a hobby! Dating isn’t one.
- Ask Me Anything: Speaking of interests, ask me about me. I find you sexy and entertaining, that’s why I agreed to this meet up. But a date isn’t a one man show. So, ask me a question and listen to my answer. Bonus points for a follow up round.
- Interweb: Don’t google us, stalk us on Facebook, or procure any other cheat sheet of our life story before we can tell you the tales. Give us the chance to let you get know us for reals. Nothing ruins an adorably detailed question on a date quite like realizing the dude has been investigating you.
- Be Generous: Money is cool, but we’re above all that. At the end of the day, a woman wants to feel like she’s the one you’d rather have, for sho. But, you should offer to foot the bill, at least for the first date. That’s right, try to pay, even if I make more than you, because it let’s me know you’re invested and want to treat a girl right.
- Express Yourself: No one, not even the most Type A ho, wants to date someone who can’t articulate their personality. Don’t always bow to us when it’s decision making time. Go for what you want, otherwise we’ll wind up feeling like we’re forcing ourselves and all our taste on you, which eventually begins to feel kind of sexual predator-y.
- Beggars Can’t Be Choosers: Not everyone is going to love your Celine Dion-esque dance moves, but the right girl will! So, don’t go around chasing every woman hoping you’ll be able to get enough pity that someone will finally settle for you. Lame. Women talk, and we know when someone has been trying to put it in all the ladies at the party. If you’re a dude who likes attention, wouldn’t you rather have one enthusiastic audience member than one hundred bored seat fillers? So, pick someone who seems just as special and go for her! You’re looking for your match, not just anyone.
- Reach Out And Touch Someone: Pick up the phone and call me, email, or IM me, whatever. Please, don’t rely solely on text to communicate plans. I need more than two fingers to tell you what I’m thinking…well, maybe, wink.
So, that’s my two cents. But help a guy out, chime in with what you Frisky ladies go for. What makes you want to date a dude?