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Keepin’ It Classy: Can I Bring A Date To A Wedding If The Invite Is Only Addressed To Me?

While we’d like to raise a glass to any happy couple, this week, The Frisky is celebrating weddings. Sometimes the protocol can get a little cloudy, and you don’t want to rain on someone’s special day so we’re going to cut through the cake and give it to you straight. First things first: arm candy. Can you bring a date if they’re not explicitly on the invite?

With this kind of party, the hosts don’t always feel the more, the merrier. Weddings are expensive, and, a lot of times, brides and grooms don’t want to pay for a plus-one you’re going to dump before they come back from their honeymoon. Or they want to keep their affair to a close-knit group of BFFs and family. Or they already invited the exact capacity of the hall where the reception is being held. No matter what the lame excuse, frequently, they’ll send us unmarried ladies and invitation for one. Boo, fo’ sho’. But before you just give up an go stag, here’s what you can do about it!Even though weddings can be a great place to meet someone, no one should have to go solo. (Heck, I’m dragging my bestie to one this weekend so I don’t have to dance with myself.) But the standard, proper, way to extend someone an invitation to a wedding is to invite them and a date. So, if your invite is addressed solely to you, here’s what you can do: Ask the bride or groom if you can bring someone. The bride is preferable, since she is typically the one doing the planning. Call or email to inquire if your invite includes a date and mention the person you were hoping to have escort you. Often, if you just ask, they’ll totally be down for two of you. Hey, if there’s anyone who should understand that you want your special someone by your side, it should be people getting married!

However, if they say no, know that you can, too. Sure, the reason will be obvious, but you don’t have to go to something that’ll make you feel uncomfortabe… unless it’s family, in which case the wedding will always be awkward and you have to attend it.

Whatever you do, do NOT:

  1. Just show up with someone without checking with the bride and/or groom first.
  2. Trash talk or even mention your inability to bring someone at the wedding, despite how naturally it’ll come up when you’re open bar-drunk and have no one to smooch.
  3. Ask the mother of the bride or some other high falutin’ person involved for the extra spot. Be a lady, respect the peeps and their special day by going straight to the bride and groom with your plus-one issues.
  4. Pester them after they’ve told you “no,” because you might push them into admitting something pathetic about their financial situation which will embarrass both of you. And then you’ll feel about bad not giving them a big cash gift.
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