Keepin’ It Classy: The Costume Conundrum

This weekend, the new “Star Trek” prequel hits theaters. I’ve got tickets for the movie screening, but I bet it’ll be more of a sci-fi fashion show! Even the most die hard Trekkie has to wonder: Can a true lady boldly go to the theater in a costume?

Yes! Grace is all about having a sense of humor. Otherwise, you come off as a Stuffy Muffy, especially if all the other peeps in the place will be wearing full gear. So, if the spandex suit fits, wear it!

That said, you can’t go parading around the mall looking like a space alien-princess any old time, unless you’re a kid, because then you’re cuteness outweighs the creep factor. As for adults, during an “appropriate” time, like the “Star Trek” movie premiere, a masquerade ball, Halloween, or behind bedrooms doors, you can wear whatever crazy getup you want. This is your big friggin’ chance! So long as you head this advice, there’s no need to be embarrassed:

  1. Show Off (Don’t Fall Out Of) Your Ensemble: Parties that encourage costumes aren’t necessarily encouraging you to look like a straight-up skank. Unless you’re going to a “swinging” soiree, keep it in your pants. Nothing cheapens a gal’s sex appeal more than a costume that doesn’t fit her—or the vibe.
  2. Take It To The Max: Contrary to what costume shops will try to convince you, how much you spend on your getup isn’t as important as how you rock the look. Try to wear something that plays up your natural hotness. This has nothing to do with money; just like any other outfit you wear, it’s about style. So don’t half-ass it. If you’re getting in a costume, go whole hog! The more little awesomely accurate touches, the better, and by better I mean the less lame you will look.
  3. Make It Obvious: Be careful with your costume choice. I would have dressed up like a Wuzzle by now if I didn’t think everyone would mistake me for a furry fetishist. If you’re into furries, cool, the rules don’t apply in the bedroom. But, if you’re some innocent kook, well, google that idea before you go for it!
  4. Consider The Weather: A really important factor in picking a costume is weather. You don’t want to be wearing a long trench coat in the summer or nuthin’ but body paint in the winter or during a storm, for that matter. Whether it’s sweat or rain, you don’t want to look like you’re melting. Be sure to keep your make up fresh, your wig on straight, and your outfit in order. Costumes take a lot of maintenance.
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