Kate Moss To Pen Autobiography

Kate Moss has agreed to write a “no-holds barred” autobiography, which will be published by Virgin Books. Richard Branson, who has been friends with Kate since she was 15 and owns a stake in Virgin Books, says the book will contain not only salacious details about Kate’s life, but also anecdotes about her celebrity friends. The book deal, which is valued at an estimated $1.5 million, was agreed upon way back in 2006, but publication was delayed to let Kate repair her reputation after she got busted on camera snorting cocaine.

After the jump, the questions we want Kate to answer. If they’re not addressed, we’ll expect a full refund from Barnes & Noble.

  1. What’s the total worth of all the cocaine she’s allegedly snorted?
  2. Pete effing Doherty? Did she leave him because he didn’t make enough money or was it his drug use? Or maybe the open sores on his face? And is there any weight to his claims that she has stalking tendencies?
  3. Would she want the same life for her daughter Lila Grace Moss? And why didn’t she give her daughter Jefferson Hack’s last name?
  4. Kate reportedly flunked most of her classes in high school, so was modeling her only option?
  5. Has she ever been anorexic and/or bulemic? And, if not, what exactly keeps her so thin?
  6. Has Kate ever been intimate with Richard Branson?
  7. Is Gwyneth Paltrow really as annoying as we suspect?
  8. And, seriously, was all the frenzy surrounding the opening of Topshop in New York City really warranted?
  9. Lastly, on a scale of one to 10, how good in bed is Johnny Depp? We suspect he’s an 18.