10 Lies You’ve Been Told About Sex

The studs over at Spike did a hilarious round up of “The Top Ten Lies You’ve Been Told About Sex.” From “Green M&Ms Make You Horny” to “Black Dudes Have Gigantic Dongs,” they’re breaking down myths and making us bust out laughing. Men sure have been told some serious clunkers! But we women have had the wool pulled over our eyes, too. Here are some humdingers ladies have had to listen to …

  1. Sex is only something you share with someone you love. Try tellin’ that to my last stunt man. Sometimes you need to bring a guy in for the action scenes.
  2. Your hot pocket smells like it’s fish flavored, so you gotta douche! It might not smell like lilies and rainbows but douching makes women more prone to bacterial infections. It’s the douche that will make you stanky.
  3. Guys should be gentle with girls. Yeah, baby? I like it raw!
  4. All the cool kids are doing it! After I did it, I still wasn’t cool.
  5. Good sex lasts all night long. I can have hot sex in 10 minutes. Shoot, even a study proved we need just three to 13 minutes of nookie. Drawing sex out can be like getting stuck watching a four hour movie — you wish they’d cut out some bits and speed things up.
  6. Women don’t need sex as much as men. Oh, I have needs! And if I don’t have a dude to do the job for me, I gotta do it myself. Plus, men and women both have their sexual peaks, they just don’t necessarily even out all the time.
  7. Guys should always make the first move. Just ask The Frisky’s own Amelia and Catherine. In these modern times, we ladies have to be as aggressive as men have ever been. There’s no sitting back and saying, “Come and get it!”
  8. Men think about sex more than women. Maybe everything doesn’t make us pop a girl boner, but I’m as pervy as the construction workers who whistle at me. Now that it’s spring, eye candy makes me want to get it good and plenty.
  9. Guys only like skinny chicks. Every girl is hot, and I mean every. The first girl at my college to get a boyfriend had duck feet and a moustache, and her boyfriend followed her around like a puppy. But you don’t have to take my word for it, ask our Mind Of Man, John Devore.
  10. All men want to have a threesome. Sure, they might fantasize about it, but in reality they may fear you’ll switch teams right before their very eyes. Rather than lose you to another woman, a lot of guys would rather dream a little dream.
Tags: sex lies