Star Trek: My Secret Shame Is Suddenly Hip

I’ve never announced this in such a public forum. I, Amelia, am a Trekkie. When I was 12, I wrote a book (200 pages, single-spaced). A Star Trek book. There was Trekkie friendship and Trekkie romance, and writing it was my outlet at a time when I was very shy and very acne-d. I have gone to not one but two “Star Trek” conventions — although, in my defense, it was my dad’s idea. My first celebrity crush was on Wil Wheaton, who played Wesley on “The Next Generation,” and I wrote him two fan letters. “Star Trek II: The Wrath Of Khan” is the best of the movies, but I hate “Star Trek: IV,” otherwise known as “the one with the whales.” I still watch “Star Trek” sometimes, when I catch an episode on TV, and no one is around to make fun of me. I have seen every episode of the first series and the “Next Generation” series multiples times, and I think the other series pale in comparison.

For 20 years, “Star Trek” has been my secret shame, my guilty pleasure. Being a “Star Trek” fan has never, ever, ever been cool. “Star Wars” and “Battlestar Gallactica” have always been for the cool nerds. “Star Trek” was for the friendless losers. But seeing Heidi Klum flashing the “Live Long and Prosper” gang sign at the L.A. premiere of the “Star Trek” prequel movie made me realize something. My secret shame is suddenly cool. And I am annoyed. Suddenly, celebrities are jumping on the “Star Trek” bandwagon! Heidi Klum! Hayden Panetierre! Tori Spelling! Winona Ryder! Blair from f**king “Gossip Girl”! Who’s next? Lindsay Lohan? George Clooney? BARACK OBAMA? And when celebs dub something cool, the masses follow. It won’t be hard for the general public to go “Star Trek” crazy, especially since the new movie stars a cast of young hotties like Chris Pine and Zoe Saldana. And you know who will be forgotten in the process? Well, William Shatner, for one, who didn’t even get a cameo in the new movie, and real fans like myself (and Simcha!), who know Captain Kirk’s middle name (Tiberius), who have seen the episode with Spock’s evil-goateed twin (“Mirror, Mirror”), and who remember Joan Collins’ pivotal guest starring role (playing a woman Kirk falls in love with back in time but has to let die so Hitler doesn’t win World War II) — WITHOUT having to use Google.

Did I just admit all that? Oops. I guess it will take me a little time to get used to the fact that being a “Star Trek” fan isn’t something to hide anymore. Still, I’ll fight you for a seat on opening night!

Tags: star trek, trends