Seven Movies To Rent Instead of Going To See Beyonce’s “Obsessed”
This weekend, Beyonce’s new movie “Obsessed” is opening, but it doesn’t look so (Sasha) fierce. Actually, it looks like something we’ve seen before. Many, many times. Darn it, Beyonce, you are a diva, and you deserve better than some rehashed plot! After the jump, seven films that will save you $12.
“A Perfect Murder”: Gwyneth Paltrow gets down and dirty. She cheats on Michael Douglas with Viggo Mortensen, and then her affair turns into the perfect murder.
“Fatal Attraction”: When a lawyer (Michael Douglas) has a fling with his co-worker, she won’t let their love go. Things get ugly in a way that isn’t fun for the whole family. Let these two jealous murder movies be a lesson to us all. Don’t cheat with Michael Douglas!
“My Super Ex-Girlfriend”: Uma Thurman uses her super powers to sniff out her man’s sitch. Hey, if Luke Wilson was our BF, we wouldn’t let him go without a fight either.
“Mr. Jealousy”: Noah Baumbach, Wes Anderson’s BFF, made a movie with firecrotch Eric Stoltz back in the 90’s. It’s about a substitute teacher obsessed with his GF’s ex.
“The Crush”: Alicia Silverstone made one good movie besides “Clueless.” In this flick, she plays a 14 year old who sabotages a dude who spurns her sexual harassment. As a result, Alicia wants him deader than her career is now.
“I Love You To Death”: Kevin Kline stars in this story about a real life attempted murder in Pennsylvania. Frances Toto tries to kill a woman’s cheating husband by hiring hitmen. Although they failed, after many hilarious attempts, she spent four years in prison. Talk about the old ball and chain!
“The Hand That Rocks The Cradle”: Rebecca De Mornay plays a nanny who really, really wants to get revenge on the family that hired her. It’s a total departure from her role in “Risky Business”!