Heidi & Spencer: We Look Back On All Their Breakups

Five months after eloping in Mexico—post-pitchers of margaritas, natch—Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt of “The Hills” are making their marriage official in a ceremony in Pasadena on Saturday. [People] — As a present for the infamously douchey duo, let’s look back at the times they broke up.

  • Season 2, Episode 1. Before they were even a couple, they were on the outs. In 2006, Spencer started wooing Heidi. Only, he was also wooing Audrina Patridge. Not only did he take both girls to the exact same restaurant two nights in a row; then he tried to turn them against each other by bringing Audrina to Heidi’s work event and proceeding to swear on his mother’s life that Audrina had followed him there. It’s like he was trying to be a girl’s worst nightmare. What happened to hoes before bros? Heidi lapped it up and the two became a happy couple — until …
  • Season 3, Episode 18. Because Spencer spread nasty rumors about Lauren Conrad, Heidi was miserable without her friends. Speidi was engaged, living together, and spending every second fighting. Finally, Heidi came to her senses and flew home to Colorado to take a break from Skin Beard Spencer. Spencer followed her and stuck around even after being asked by her parents to leave. Hmm. Family and friends or Spencer Bratt? Tough one. Heidi stuck to her guns until episode 28, when Spencer chased her to Las Vegas. He put her job at risk, but to Heidi nothing says lovin’ like almost getting you fired.
  • Season 4, Episode 19. In season 4, Spencer got Heidi fired when he mouthed off to one of her superiors and encouraged her to get drunk at a work event. We’re not sure how she kept her job for so long, when all she did was complain about her boyfriend. Nineteen episodes later, Spencer had convinced Heidi to go to Mexico with him, where they eloped. Turns out, that union’s not legal. It should have been the perfect opportunity for Heidi to run. Instead, Heidi stuck around and, after an aborted court marriage, decided to plan the big wedding of her dreams.
  • Season 5, Episode 4. After Spencer got caught flirting with a hot bartender and taking her out for what looked suspiciously like a double date, Heidi gave Spencer an ultimatum: Go to a relationship counselor or else. What did he say to the therapist in last night’s episode? “I’m in a nightmare.” It looked like Speidi might be dunzo. But things must work out because they’re getting married this weekend. Will Heidi ever stop drinking the Kool-Aid?