10 Reasons You’re A Twitter Loser

Oprah joined Twitter today, which I’m sure must be some sort of milestone in the life of everyone’s favorite social networking site. Now that the Fail Whale has truly gone mainstream, it’s more important than ever that you put your best tweet forward. I mean, you may think your Twitter behavior is innocuous enough, but if any of the following statements sound familiar, I’m afraid to tell you: You’re a Twitter loser.

  1. You follow 500 people but only have 35 people following you.
  2. You tweet more than 10 times a day.
  3. You’ve replaced drunk dialing with drunk tweeting.
  4. It’s not a holiday for you until you wish all your followers a happy one.
  5. Your favorite source for news is Twitter.
  6. You once got a tweet from Ashton Kutcher and immediately called your mom to tell her about it.
  7. Then you printed a copy of his tweet and stuck it on your fridge with your favorite Dollywood magnet.
  8. You know it’s spring because you keep seeing the Twitter logo everywhere.
  9. The last time you socialized with anyone in person was when you went to a Tweetup at Applebees last month.
  10. You actually think anyone cares what you ate for lunch.
Tags: list, twitter