What do you do when your show’s ratings are slipping/your career is tanking? Duh. You go lesbo for five minutes. “Desperate Housewives,” deep in its fifth season slump, hoped a little girl-on-girl smooch would reel in ratings, so Teri Hatcher and Eva Longoria Parker swapped spit in Sunday’s episode. We’ll soon see if it worked. “I’m a great kisser,” Eva Longoria Parker told Us Weekly. “She was not supposed to kiss back, so [Hatcher] was kind of just there, and I had to do all the work.” Progressive social commentary or skanky publicity stunt? No brainer. Keep clicking for our favorite desperate lesbian moments.