For The Week Of March 9-15, 2009

Virgo (August 23 – September 22)

Embrace your independence, because as of right now, that will be the only thing that will lead you back to sanity. If you spend too much time listening to your honey go on and on about whatever he thinks is right, you will eventually start questioning yourself — and darling, no need for that. You’re right, he’s wrong. Give it time, you’ll get to say, “I told you so.”

Libra (September 23 – October 22)

If it sounds like guilt, feels like guilt, know it as guilt. Don’t feel bad for decisions you have to make for you, because this is your life and you’re entitled to feel as happy as you want to. For anyone that doesn’t see it that way, know they have no place in their life, no matter how deep your history goes with them or how good you want to view them.

Scorpio (October 23 – November 21)

Your life is finally heading to new heights of fun, bringing back your optimist — hallelujah! Go ahead, make up fantasies and get lost in. Dream up all fantastical scenarios to go head over heels on. While they might not happen, the inspiration alone is worth ODing on because through it, other great accomplishments will come through and no matter what, will land you on your feet.

Sagittarius (November 22 – December 21)

Keeping your composure will be your biggest task this week, as someone who thinks himself as an authority figure will spout off information that’s not his to share, putting you in an uncomfortable position. Sure, we all put our foot in our mouths, but if there’s no remorse, that is when you know that person as a jerk and to make necessary steps to avoid further incrimination.

Capricorn (December 22 – January 19)

Let loose and have a little more fun than usual. This means putting that nagging disciplined voice of yours on mute and taking on a more devil may care attitude, as it’ll be the times you feel trouble coming on that’ll put you in the most prime place to get that little somethin’-somethin’ that’ll give you your groove back.

Aquarius (January 20 – February 18)

When it comes to sharing, you might be its poster child, but that doesn’t mean you have to be. Face it, being generous can be a thankless job, especially if you are dealing with spoiled patrons that don’t seem to get that your kindness is not a right, but a privilege. Of course, being a martyr without anyone asking isn’t required either; so think twice before opening yourself up too much.

Pisces (February 19 – March 20)

They’ll be no holding you back when it comes to airing out your opinions. Seems somewhere along this week, you’re going to snap and let all the venom ooze out of you until you get your point of contention in its place. While this might burn a bridge, feel relief that you’ve crossed it enough times to never have to go back anyway.

Aries (March 21 – April 19)

Any paranoids you have in regard to health issues, deal with them now. Otherwise, your paranoia this week will be heighten to a new level of dysfunction, putting you in a ringy state of mind that won’t only make you a bitch to everyone around you and a self sabotaging maniac to yourself. Yes save yourself by dealing with obvious priorities.

Taurus (April 20 – May 20)

Good news is on the way. Chances are a friend will have something interesting for you, which is a direct win for you or can inadvertently set you onto a path that will lead you to something you’ve been wishing for. Whichever the case, this will mean having to listen closely and even in-between the lines if you must. However, once you hear what you need, it’ll be obvious.

Gemini (May 21 – June 20)

Your Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde will be flip-flopping all over themselves, trying to get in face time with everyone you know, making you one crazy mixed bag of nuts. Of course, chances are you have an odd variety of people around you, making it easy to pick out the freaks that get off on this kind of thing. After all, why waste this level of insanity on just yourself?

Cancer (June 21 – July 22)

When it comes to basic communications with others, you’re going to have to take the high route — perhaps so high, that you might have to walk over them to get to a new plateau. To say the least, they’ll be several occasions where someone you thought had a chance will start talking out of their ass and if you don’t take it as a sign, you will only have yourself to blame.

Leo (July 23 – August 22)

There will be many things that’ll irritate you beyond belief this week, but this isn’t the time to express anger back. Best to just see these misgivings for what they are and quietly mark them down as points against these wrongdoers. When the time is right and with the proper strategy, you will be able to unload, move ahead of these twits and get back to where you belong — on top.