I’m The Inside Spoon And I’m A Dude

Over the years, I’ve admitted to a lot of embarrassing things. I told you, dear reader, that I work for a ladies magazine, I have been known to have my back waxed and that I use Facebook responsibly (using anything responsibly is a buzz-kill for a crazy mo-fo like me). But the most embarrassing thing I could think to write about today is that I enjoy being on the inside of a spoon and I’m a dude.I’d imagine that you’d like to take a second to collect your thoughts as your mind has been straight-up blown, feel free, I’ve all day. Got yourself together? Great. I hope you’re sitting down for this next part: I’m into ladies. Sorry, I should have given you more time. You good now? And finally, I’m into normal-sized, non-masculine women. No gargantuan, bearded ladies are up in this piece. In summary, I prefer the inside position on a spoon, I’m heterosexual, not into dominating (or domineering) ladies and I’m a dude. Jesus, it feels like I just dropped a load of bricks off my shoulders. And it’s not like I mind being the outside spoon from time to time, I’m not a monster.

I’ve gone through most of my adult life under the impression that there was something slightly wrong with me. Who’s ever heard of a dude that likes getting held? (Note: the hugging has to end before I have any chance of falling asleep, seriously.) But this weekend, I heard about another man who doesn’t mind be the inner huggee. If it’s even possible, this guy is even more macho than me and even more into normal ladies. If there are two of us out there, there have to be more. More dudes who are the inside spoon.

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