Many black women are quick to point out that there are no good single black men out here. It turns out, they might actually be right, which also may explain why more black women remain unmarried than white women. Forty-two-percent of black women have never been married, compared to 21% of white woman, according to national statistics. That’s double, chicks! Within the last two generations, marriage rates for African-Americans have dropped significantly. Between 1970 and 2001, the black marriage rate dropped by 34 percent, compared to 17 percent in the general population. African-American women are also the least likely group to get married in the United States. That’s pretty sad. And if they wed an African-American man, those couples have the highest divorce rate in the United States. So what the hell is going on?
There are many reasons that are always thrown around as to why a black woman isn’t married. The incarceration rate for black men is higher than any other. There is an increase in black men dating and marrying outside of their race. The are some black men on the “down low” (they have sex with other men on the sly). Black women are “more independent” and don’t need a man to take care of them. The list of reasons can go on and on.
But no matter what the reason is as to why a black woman isn’t married, it just goes to show the pressure society puts on people to get married no matter what your race is. Sure, you may have all these great things going for you in your life, but if you aren’t married then nothing matters. It’s like the only reason I was put on Earth was to get married.
Take, for instance, my mother. She’s black. She’s 53, speaks five languages, has two degrees, owns her home and her car, and has a job. Not to mention she’s beautiful! And yet she still has never been married. It’s not that she hasn’t thought about it, but we all know it’s hard finding someone worthy of spending the rest of your life with. This is a common theme for a lot of black women. They are independent and attractive but still remain alone and unmarried. But on the other hand, there are plenty of black women out here married and in great relationships. In the end, who gives a crap what the statistic say, so long as people are satisfied with their lives?
Here’s an idea. Maybe we should spend less time focusing on marriage statistics and spend more time enjoying our lives, even if they don’t include a marriage proposal in the future. [The Star Press]