I’m a Capricorn girl (moon in Pisces, Venus in Sagittarius, Mars in Libra) who’s four years into a long-distance relationship with a Sagittarian guy (moon in Cancer, Venus in Capricorn, Mars in Virgo). I think we both feel a sense of being drawn to the other, but this long-distance situation has taken a big toll on me emotionally. My biggest problem is that I have such a hard time trusting him and believing his motives are genuine. My dad (Aries) was a philanderer so my natural cynicism and disbelief that men can truly love and be happy with one woman is quite high. Sag guy makes an effort to listen to my doubts, learn to communicate better through words, and let me know how important I am to him. I think I love his freewheeling Sag ways when we’re together, but feel some concern over them when we’re apart. We’ve recently agreed to him making the move to where I am and he really wants to live with me. It feels like a huge risk; I’m afraid of losing my freedom and strength because I let myself be taken for a ride by a deceptive man. Essentially, of being in the position my mother (Sag) was in. At the same time I really enjoy his company.
I’m worried, on one hand, that there’s something I’m picking up on and that he’ll end up using me somehow. On the other hand, I’m worried that if he really is a nice guy, I can’t love him completely because of my fears. Does it seem stupid for us to go ahead with him moving? – Cold Feet
Yes, you should definitely go for it! Why sabotage yourself? Jump in and love that you’ve found an awesome guy. Just reread your words — every time you mention a question, you answer it with an example of him quelling that matter. Plus, you’ve been together for four years, he wants to move to where you are and you find yourself to be healthier with him than without. There is nowhere else for this relationship to go, but to where it already is — the shacking up stage. Since no relationship comes with guarantees, the questions you have about this monumental shift in your life are healthy — but at this point, the only way to sort it out is through action, then taking it one day at a time.
Of course, to make this relationship or any other work, you’re going to have to deal with those daddy issues and learn to see that not ALL men are like him. Luckily, as a Capricorn, you’ll have a lot of astrological help, as Pluto (the planet of transformation) has recently moved to your sign, a transit that only happens every 12-16 years, and one that hasn’t happened in your sign since the American Revolution! That should tell you how powerful the changes coming for you can be, as it’ll push you to tear down worn-out structures and get in touch with a bolder, stronger and braver one. Plus, with January 9, 2009 being the start to eclipses (harbingers of sudden change) in your identity and commitment sectors, this will only mean bigger things for you in terms of loving yourself and a significant other. So, get ready for a journey that’ll have you confronting all that you currently fear to conquer and destroy.
Got a question for our Astrosexologist, Kiki T? Email firstname.lastname@example.org and be sure to include any astrological information about yourself and any other people involved in your query! For a quicker fix on mastering your man, read Kiki’s astral opus, “The Celestial Sexpot’s Handbook.”