10 Cool Things To Do On Christmas

If you’re a Heeb like me, Christmas can be one long, boring day off. None of your friends are around to hang out, you probs have nothing to do besides watch TV reruns of Christmas specials — snooze-a-palooza! Well, just because the mall and every restaurant is closed — besides the Chinese joint — doesn’t mean you can’t fill your day with fun! Here are 10 Cool Things To Do On Christmas:

1. See A Flick: Movie theaters stay open. Plus, around Christmas, there are a lot of future Oscar contenders out like “The Curious Case Of Benjamin Button.” Or, you know, “Marley & Me.”
2. DIY Dildo: For that crafty bitch with some time on her hands, make your own masturbator. Or if you’re too lazy, you can just get off with these household items.3. Local Attractions: A lot of family activities, from bowling to indoor sky-diving, cash in on days when people have off. So, if you’re feeling adventurous, call up some nearby thrill-seeking spots and see if they’re open.
4. New Years Resolutions: A day off to reflect is the perfect time to come up with the things you want to achieve in 2009. Make a list now, and you’ll have time to check it twice before January 1st.
5. Repair: Crap around your house is broken! From those awesome socks with the hole in them to that busted glass figurine, get out your glue and a sewing needle and fix that junk!
6. Bubble Bath: Take some long, hot, luxurious time to yourself in the tub.
7. Winter Sports: Take advantage of the weather. Sled, snowboard, ski, snow ball fight, or if you’re really lucky and are in Cali or Florida, go hit the beach!
8. Get Organized: Screw spring cleaning when the weather is nice, winter is the best time to clear out your closet, garage, and/or basement. You can also donate those things you’re not using to charity for a sweet tax write-off right before the end of the year. Bonus!
9. Surf: Stores might be closed but the Internet is open 24/7, 365 days a year. You’re already off to a great start by checking out The Frisky!
10. Work It Out: Finally put in that exercise video and give it a shot. Or, just check your local cable listings for an aerobics instructional show. With all the boozing and chowing down, it might do you some good to move around a little.