A friend asked me last night, “Do you wish your breakup had been over and done with quickly, like ripping a band-aid off? Or was it easier having it take awhile for the relationship to be completely done?” To be honest, I wish it had just ended; that it had been completely and irrevocably done immediately, rather than the long, drawn out, painful process that it’s been. I’ve also thought a lot about what would have been “better” circumstances for my breakup from my fiance — would it have helped, in the long run, if he had cheated? Been a complete and total a-hole? I’m not sure. One thing I do know, however, is that allowing my relationship to be “in limbo” for three months made my breakup feel incredibly fresh when my ex told me — over the phone! — on Sunday that he was no longer in love with me. Those words hadn’t been said yet, I had been holding out hope that perhaps there was a way we could work things out, that down the line we would work out way back to each other. But hearing him say he was no longer in love with me gutted me with the same feeling I had the day he said he needed space and that he wasn’t sure if he wanted to get married — but it dulled far more quickly this time and filled me with the resolve that things were OVER and I was much better off.