Face Off: Team Aniston Vs. Team Jolie

It’s been nearly four years since Brad Pitt left Jennifer Aniston and took up with his “Mr. and Mrs. Smith” costar Angelina Jolie. Yet in 2008, one’s alliance with Team Aniston or Jolie has been perhaps as important a statement as being on Team Obama or McCain.

“People are fascinated because many have personally experienced a similar scenario,” clinical social worker Armena Walsh explains. “Having one’s heart broken or being involved in breaking a heart is something people relate to. An obvious draw to this situation is how public the heartbreak was. It’s an issue people have attached moral values to.”

“In our minds, Brad and Jen were the golden couple,” adds relationship expert Dr. Gilda Carle, author of books including How to WIN When Your Mate Cheats. “People look at their split as: Wow, if the gold has tarnished on this relationship, I wonder if it can tarnish on mine.”

And, like it or not, whether you choose to cheer for Team Aniston or Jolie says something about you. “Whoever you team up with politically, theatrically or, in this case, in the tabloids, you’re going to end up identifying with that person or team’s values,” adds Dr. Gilda. “So if you team up with Angelina, there may be some femme fatale in you. If you team up with Jennifer, there may be some victim in you.”

While we duke it out over Jen and Angie, the bigger mystery is how Brad slips away virtually unscathed. “I often get letters from women blasting the ‘other woman,'” Dr. Gilda shares. “And it’s like – hello?! The ‘other woman’ wasn’t cheating by herself. She had a conspirator. Does he not count for any of your anger? Most times, the guy walks off scott free!”

So how do Team Aniston and Team Jolie stack up? We, well, pitt them against one another in a new face off.

STYLE FILE Hippie chic, complete with toe rings and beads. She trends toward classic style, then makes it unique with an accessory (like body art).
HAIR APPARENT It’s all about the highlights — bonus points if her significant other has matching ones. She prefers a single-process color on her glorious locks.
EXERCISE REGIME Any and all with a preference for yoga. An active lifestyle — and really good genes.
HER “TYPE” Right now, she’s down with the cougar trend, but typically likes artsy guys around her age. Men, women, young, old, relatives — she doesn’t discriminate.
RELATIONSHIP MANTRA “This too shall pass.” “Love the one you’re with!”
MOMMY OR DADDY’S GIRL? Daddy’s girl. She’s got Mommy issues. Mommy’s girl. She’s got Daddy issues.
TYPE OF FRIEND She’s a girl’s girl and is tight with friends from her school days. She’s a guy’s girl. Not too many gal pal’s on her Facebook profile.
THOUGHTS ON PLASTIC SURGERY A gal’s gotta do what a gal’s gotta do, but you won’t hear her blabbing about it. She loves knives, but not much for going under them.
HOME BASE She enjoys travel, but put down roots not far from where she grew up. She’s a woman of the world — you should see her passport!
IDEAL DATE A cozy restaurant (hold the carbs!) or a game night at a friend’s. Cocktails in London, dinner in Paris, dessert in Brussels.
CHARITY CASE She donates her time when she has it — she’s a busy girl! She’ll go to the ends of the earth to help people in need.
FAVORITE GENRE The comedy lover definitely has a funny bone. She’s a drama queen.
FAVORITE ACCESSORY Dogs! The more the merrier . Kids, kids, kids. The more the merrier.
HOW SHE GETS OVER A BREAKUP She relies on friends to set her up with someone new. Someone new — single, dating, married, who cares!?