Sound Off: What Would You Do If You Had A Penis For A Day?

To any guys reading this post — this is indeed a conversation most women have in their lifetime with their friends. We are fascinated by that thing dangling between your legs. What it feels like there, how pants fit comfortably, what it’s like when you’re standing at a urinal and are tempted to glance at the dude next to you. And yes, what it feels like to have sex with one of us. So with that in mind, I polled some of the ladies I know to find out what exactly they would do if they had a manhood for a moment, a schlong for a spell, a willie for a week, a d–k for a day — above is the convo that Sexpert Lindsay and I had over IM, and the rest are after the jump. But one thing I’m wondering of you — do guys ever theorize about what they would do if they had a vagina?“I’d check out this whole urinal thing. The etiquette of urinal peeing fascinates me. Can I look down at the dude next to me to compare? Do I have to stare straight ahead? How does that WORK, exactly? If I was a dude, I think every single time I’d walk into the bathroom and some guy was peeing in a urinal, I’d feel like I walked in on them! ‘Oops! Sorry, didn’t know someone was in here.’ Awkward.” – Jocelyn

“I would sit on the subway with my legs spread open taking up the entire seat. I hate when men do that.” – Kelly

“I would have tons of sex. I think sex is probably way better for dudes.” – Layla

“I wouldn’t want an actual d–k. But I would want to be a guy because then I could be powerful without seeming like I’m a bitch. Like, I could BE a d–k.” – Catherine

“I would want to have sex with a woman, but in the way that girls just can’t — like different positions, doggy-style and stuff. Honestly, I don’t think I could have an orgasm in many of the positions that men can.” – Louisa

“I would pee standing up, in public, just because I could.” – Anna

“You know how in the Pamela Anderson and Tommy Lee sex tape, Tommy put his penis between his legs like a woman? I would do that, just to freak people out.” – Cassie

“I would have sex with every woman I possibly could, to see how it felt physically and to see how it felt emotionally to be a total man-whore.” – Jenn

“Masturbate. A lot. In the shower though, because even as a guy, sperm would gross me out.” – Brie

“Seriously, I don’t think I would be able to stop touching it. I would just fondle myself all day.” – Erin

“Do I get balls too? I think that’s really the part that would be the most fun and fascinating. And part of me would want to be kicked in the balls, just to see why guys act like such wimps about it. Oh and I would definitely tea bag someone and take a picture.” – Julia

“First I would pee in as many spots as possible outside. Then I would write my name with it.” – Meaghan

“I would pee on people’s heads from a roof and then write my name in the snow.” — Lauren

“I think I would draw a happy face on the tip and make the pee hole talk. My wiener would say, ‘Hi Amelia, how are you today?’ I would be pretty busy that day, actually.” – Colleen