Hate to say it, but some romantic gestures are gross and cheesy and not at all what we want when a guy is trying to make a statement. That said, there are some really, really sweet, kind, funny things a man can do to melt our cold hearts. Here are the ten things we’d seriously rather you not do to woo us, plus ten gestures that really will turn us to mush.
Things That Are Intended To Be Romantic But Provoke Gag Reflex
1. Having your date get down on his knees at a movie theater and serenade you to New Edition’s “Mr. Telephone Man”.
2. Having your date order for you (um maybe I wanted the chicken?)
3. Rolling in money “Indecent Proposal” style. Money is one of the dirtiest and most germ-infested things on the planet.
4. Rose petals leading to the bed, on the bed, surrounding the bed, whatever. Hello cliché!
5. Joint shower.One of you will be freezing while the other is under the hot water. Shampoo in the eyes. Mascara running down your face. Need I say more?
6. Corsages and boutonnières — even at prom.
7. Proposing on the Jumbotron at a sports game. Public proposals are just awkward, period.
8. Proclaiming your love via AIM or Facebook status. What are you 12? [Sigh. I did this. -- Editor]
9. Sex on the beach = sand in hard to reach and clean crevices.
10. Horse and Carriage rides. Those horses stink. And some of us consider it animal cruelty. And that vagabond of a driver is really going to charge your 40 bucks for four blocks.
10 Things That Will Actually Turn Us To Mush
1. An unrequested foot massage after a day in heels.
2. Bringing your favorite macaroni n’ cheese from across town when you aren’t feeling great.
3. Having your love meet you right when you’re getting off the train/plane.
4. Cooking for each other.
5. Considering your mate when you’re food shopping for your apartment and picking up snacks/tampons you know they’ll want.
6. Knowing exactly how you take your coffee and preparing it beforehand.
7. Not hogging the Tivo and making room for each other’s shows.
8. Knowing your favorite flower and making sure you always have a fresh bouquet when they are in season (for example, peonies are available in May!).
9. Meeting your friends, schmoozing your friends, getting the friends to love you.
10. Opening doors and pulling out chairs…underrated but chivalrous.