The 10 Best
1. “For those of you who don’t think length matters, I disagree.” – Martha Stewart, holding a 15-ft.-long hot dog, on an episode of her TV show.
2. “I really don’t believe that you will love the same thing when you’re 20 as you do at 30. So that was my rule: Before the age of 25, I would never get married…. I feel like you have to get to know yourself, know what you want, spend some time by yourself and be proud of who you are before you can share that with someone else.”—Beyonce
3. “I shave and groom my private areas. It’s a better presentation for me. If men require women to go through the pain, we should return the favor.” — Diddy4. “I’m just a big believer in ‘you must love yourself before you can love anybody else,’ and I think for me that breeds the most inspired relationships. It’s hard for me to have any proclamation about the right kind of love or how to love, because relationships are so complicated and there are so many ways to love. On one hand, there’s obsessive love and committed love and the love that friends just have for one another.” — Scarlett Johansson
5. “No-strings relationships have helped cure me of love addiction. All my life I’ve been in long-term monogamous relationships. I had to break that pattern by not allowing myself to have a relationship for a year, stopping myself from committing to men. I haven’t been celibate. I’ve had lots of dates and lots of sex, but I haven’t been pushing to turn a date into a relationship. This has been a huge thing for me.” — Alanis Morissette, on how she got over her split from Ryan Reynolds
6. “You know that stuff they say about a woman being responsible for her own orgasms? That’s all true. And in my case, that makes me responsible for pretty damned good orgasms these days. Much better orgasms than when I was twenty-two. And I wouldn’t let a man control that. Not anymore. Now I’d invite him to participate. I’ll tell you this: I’ve learned my tricks. I know what I like. I do not wait around. I initiate. And I’m not all about frequency. I favor intensity. … There have been some men in my life who have been wickedly sexy and have taught me much about sexual pleasure. There are a few men I should thank, and others I need to forget. But I don’t regret. To hell with regret. I like what I am now. I like being a mother. I like my body better since I became a mother. I feel sexier as a result of becoming a mother.”—Halle Berry
7. “The stuff I find attractive in women I always regret finding attractive. I always like a kind of madness in a woman, and when they are really, really strong. And they’re the worst — mental strong women!”—Robert Pattinson
8. “Ms. Taylor is fine. Her hospital visit was precautionary. She will be returning home shortly. At present, she is surrounded by family, friends and fabulous jewels.”—Official statement regarding Elizabeth Taylor’s health
9. “It’s hiding who you are at all times. It’s wearing make up to bed and going downstairs to the Burger King to poop and hiding alcohol in perfume bottles. That’s love.”—“Jenna” from 30 Rock
10. “We found a great rhythm. Contractions started kicking in. I sat there with her, right between her legs. We got tribal on it, we danced to it! I was DJ-ing this Brazilian music.”—Matthew McConaughey, on the birth of his son Levi.
The 5 Worst
1. “He’s a rare one. He is extraordinary and it is wonderful to watch him… the way his brain works and the way he thinks thoughts… it’s beautiful.” — Jennifer Aniston on John Mayer
2. “I’m shooting a commercial for safe sex. How ironic. Because I don’t have that.”—Tila Tequila
3. “You know what? I am actually not that much into voting. I think it’s kinda crazy that a woman is running, because I think that women deal with a lot of emotions and menopause and PMS and stuff. Like, I’m so moody all the time, I know I couldn’t be able to run a country, ‘cause I’d be crying one day and yelling at people the next day, ya know?”—Brooke Hogan
4. “There was some new guy I was dating, and it was the first time we were going to go there, and he was weird about it. So I ask [adult film star] Jenna [Jameson] for advice and she’s like, ‘Honey, it’s just a little war paint, who cares?’”—Danity Kane’s Aubrey O’Day on period sex
5. “I have been the most religious person since I was 2 years old. I always felt this crazy connection to God…. God knows the truth in all of [the Lauren Conrad sex tape rumors], and at the end of the day, that is the only thing that matters. Jesus was persecuted, and I’m going to get persecuted, ya know?”—”The Hills‘” Heidi Montag